There’s this stall at the flea market at The Curve, KL selling relatively cheap and beautiful art paintings.
I was there a couple of days ago and I bought two art pieces to decorate my otherwise dull and boring bedroom walls. But when I finally got back to Kuching, I showed my purchases to my mom, who unsurprisingly was rather unimpressed.
My mom is a Traditional Asian Mom who doesn’t know how to appreciate abstract art.
When she saw the paintings, our conversation went a little like this.
Kenny: “Look mom, I bought these paintings from KL. Nice or not?”
Mom: “What is it? Can’t see anything leh.”
Kenny: “It’s abstract art. Abstract art is liddat one, mom.”
Mom: “How much is it?” (Note: Traditional Asian Moms must know exactly how much every single one of their children’s purchases are. It’s in their genes.)
Kenny: “Don’t want to say lah.”
Mom: “How much?”
Kenny: “Don’t need to know lah.”
Mom: “…”
Kenny: “RM300…”
Mom: Cb>”HAR?!!!??!!?”
Kenny: “… plus another RM200 for the framing.”
Mom: “FIVE HUNDRED RINGGIT!?!?!?!!?!?!”
Kenny: “For two paintings!”
Mom: “YOU SPENT FIVE HUNDRED RM ON THOSE UGLY PICTURES!!!!!”
Kenny: “It’s nice what!”
Mom: “JAYDEN ANYHOW DRAW ALSO LOOK BETTER THAN THAT!!!!”
For the record, Jayden is my mother’s grandson and my three-year-old nephew. The last time I saw Jayden draw something, it looked a little like this.
Yes, my mother said this “masterpiece” is better than the RM500 paintings I bought from KL.
Don’t you just love Traditional Asian Moms?
Act Cute
Don’t you hate it?
Kids are angels. No matter what they are doing, they can make it so effortlessly cute.
I want to imitate, also fail big time.
kennysia.com Turns Two
It’s hard to believe, but exactly two years ago I started kennysia.com without much of an expectation that it would turn into a monster that it is today.
A lot of things has happened since I wrote my first entry.
For one, my site’s traffic has skyrocketed from to 16,000 a day. As of posting, kennysia.com is still the number 1 Malaysian blog on Technorati.
The best thing about that is the fame and recognition that comes with it. Whether in Kuching or KL, going out and being recognised by strangers is becoming pretty common.
Top 4 Most Commented Entries On kennysia.com
13 October – Kuching Vs Perth Dilemma – 539 Comments
27 August – Crocs Beach Review And Giveaway – 396 Comments
8 March 2006 – Kuala Lumpur International Marathon– 394 Comments
17 October – LG White Chocolate Fashion Phone Giveaway – 383 Comments
What I appreciate most about writing here is when my readers see good stuff on my site, they spread the word around telling other people to read kennysia.com. Some of my entries this past year was elevated to legendary status because of that.
Top 4 Most Memorable Entries On kennysia.com
14 January – Weight Loss Ads Are Ridiculous
I sent a letter to Osim demanding explanation why their ads for their weight loss products always feature skinny models who don’t need to lose weight. Hilarity ensued.
Despite efforts from my readers bombarding Osim headquarters with forwarded copies of this entry, Osim’s PR department launched into full defence mode and ignored all those forwarded emails. Word finally got around to Channel [V] studios and in support of my cause, I was even featured in their first episode of Poparazzi. The channel called up Osim to seek for a reply. As expected, Osim said “No comment.”
1 April – Kenny Sia Attempts To Write A Bimbo Blog
It’s becoming an April Fool’s tradition for kennysia.com to poke fun at Xiaxue, and last year it’s no different.
If there’s one thing I know about how to easily increase blog traffic, it’s to talk about Wendy Cheng – the funny, controversial, bimbotic, bitchy internet celebrity from Singapore. Love her or hate her, people are just dying for a chance to talk about her.
It’s simple, Xiaxue = Traffic.
14 June – How To Make Your Own Official World Cup Ball
This is another one of those entries that made people keep forwarding it until it made the trip around the world in people’s email inboxes. Like what happened when I poked fun at Osim, the entry reached the office of adidas Malaysia. Unlike Osim, adidas had a bit more sense of humour and sent me a pack of gifts as appreciation. Thanks!
However, things unexpectedly turned sour when the president of the Bespectacled Losers Association of Bloggers ‘Blogging Responsibly’ (BLABBR) for no reason at all accused me of plagiarising this entry. I was bemused because I didn’t plagiarise and I know it. Surprisingly, when I put out all the glaring facts in front of him and pointed out the differences between “plagiarism” and “coincidence”, he got nothing to say.
Hypocrites can go suck on it baby.
4 July – Another Fight Video Discovered On The Internet>
My parody of the Miri Schoolgirl Fight video that was widely circulated around the internet. This is definitely my favourite self-made video clip ever.
As of writing, the video was viewed 103,800 times around the world and even made it to Youtube’s Top #11 Most Viewed Video Clip during the week that it was published. Not bad for a Kuching-made content. It could’ve been more if that week wasn’t overshadowed by Zidane’s headbutt on Youtube.
As the popularity of my site climbs, I am also beginning to receive more and more offers from commercial entities to advertise their products on my blog. The most obvious examples of which are Pixart, LG Chocolate and Crocs Shoes.
I apologise if my readers felt annoyed that their regular blog reading is invaded by adverts, but running a high traffic website isn’t exactly cheap. On average, I am spending at least RM300 a month and 2 hours a day on kennysia.com. It is unfair if I have to spend time and money out of my own pocket to run a website for people to read, and yet not get anything in return to cover my expenses.
Adverts on blogs are fine as long as they’re done in moderation. 1 ad out of 10 entries isn’t exactly that bad. Besides, TV shows like Idol have a lot more ads than kennysia.com, and it’s not like people are switching their TV sets off in protest.
I welcome adverts on blogs, and I think it is a good thing that Malaysian companies are turning towards bloggers to spread the word about their products. The fact that companies are now willing to invest in online media is a sign that our locally-produced Internet content is getting better. That being said, my promise to you is that I will never sacrifice the user-friendliness for cash and I will never tell blatant lies for money.
The second year of my blogging journey saw some changes in my writing. I think that as I grow up, it is inevitable that my writing matures along with it. Blog readers who have been around for a while would notice that I have toned down my brash style considerably. I’m also staying away from large blog communities, becoming less controversial and updating less often compared to before.
There’s a few reasons for that.
The first and foremost of which is that I think internet wars are extremely stupid. Even worse if it is initiated by people who don’t even know you and yet want to control what you write. Trolls are most annoying when they repeat themselves like a broken record, acting like the High Priest of the Church of Morality telling me “With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility!™” and “Think Before You Click That Publish Button!™”
Fine then. That’s why I’m updating less because I think too much before clicking that Publish button. Happy now?
Despite toning down so much, I STILL get idiots going after my ass because they think some of my entries are too ‘controversial’. Some even had the rudeness and audacity to tell me “better delete this entry otherwise ISA go after you”.
HELLO? ARE YOU THE BLOGGER OR AM I THE BLOGGER?!
When I get comments like that, I just delete them immediately. I don’t care. I couldn’t care less about the Internal Security Act. People who wanna control how I blog should worry less about the ISA and worry more about getting their comments deleted by SIA.
SIA, as in… Kenny SIA, y’know?
Judge for yourself and tell me if you think these entries are offensive and shouldn’t be put up at all.
Top 5 Most ‘Controversial’ Entries On kennysia.com
13 March – Datuk Application Form
It’s an open secret that many Datuks are not worthy of their titles. I poked fun at that. People said I’m controversial and wanted me to remove this entry.
8 May – Kuching Traffic Police Is My Best Friend
Bribing the traffic police in Malaysia is like buying pirated DVDs – everyone knows that it’s not legal but everyone does it anyway, simply because the authorities are giving you all the avenues to. Try doing the same in Singapore, Australia or New Zealand and you wouldn’t go far.
The purpose of this entry is to demonstrate how freaking easy it is for the average Malaysian to get out of a traffic offence with some spare change. I was trying to insult police corruption in my own sarcastic way, but people got angry because they think I am advocating bribery. I am not.
10 May – Sarawak Erections Update
I poked fun at the pre-election situation in Sarawak without siding any political parties. People said I’m controversial and wanted me to remove this entry.
25 May – Zhng My Penis
I posted an entry about circumcision. My mom wanted me to remove it (the entry, not the foreskin).
She thinks that anything to do with the human penis should not be talked about at all. I’m not even talking about the penis in a rude sense, so why is it perfectly acceptable to talk about circumcision during biology classes in high school and not on my blog?
Like they care. I was still dragged into the room and disciplined at length because of this entry.
15 September – A Vote Of No Confidence
Look guys, it’s just a badly photoshopped animation of the Tun clicking a mouse. That’s all. Like that also cannot put up? Must remove ah?
One thing I am beginning to become mindful of is the amount of influence I have on kids.
When I started, most of my readers are people 20 years and above, so I exaggerate myself and blog without any form of self-restriction. Of late, I noticed an increasing number high school teenagers reading kennysia.com. Some even found out about my site after their teachers told them about it. When Hitz.fm and Mix FM plugged my site over the air, they described it as “appropriate for kids”. Then there are parents who sent me messages telling me how much their 15-year-olds enjoy reading kennysia.com.
Seriously, I didn’t use to think kids should read my site because I never intended to become anyone’s role model. In fact, I hated the thought of becoming a goody-2-shoe moral crusader.
Yet at the same time, it is flattering to know that teachers and parents are putting their faith in me. With that in mind, I reluctantly scaled back on inappropriate language and R-rated content on my site. Sure, it meant me losing a bit of my edge. But I guess it’s better lose that than to have the next 15-year-old say ‘KNNCCB’ to their parents after picking up a new vocabulary reading kennysia.com
Top 4 Personal Favourites On kennysia.com
20 January – Best of Kuching Series
4 May – It’s Been A Year Since You’re Gone
8 September – Close One Eye
6 February – Because Good Girls Like Bad Boys
So this is it.
For me, running kennysia.com is a fine balancing act between staying true to myself, providing entertaining content, documenting my own life, keeping it financially viable, being socially responsible and having a laugh while at it.
It is not easy to satisfy 16,000 readers everyday, but thank you for sticking with me through the thicks and thins for the past 2 years.
Any comments? Suggestions? Favourite entries? Worst entries? I welcome all kinds of opinion, so let me know. 🙂
Just don’t tell me to remove this entry because of ISA.
Big Day
Gonna be extremely busy running around today making sure the wedding runs smooth.
My mom lost her voice on my brother’s big day ‘cos she ate too much durians. HAHA!
Number of people who have asked when is my turn to get married (as at 11:00pm):
EIGHTEEN!
Kirsten Is 2 Years Old
Today, Kirsten turns two.
To show everyone how much I love her, here’s a video tribute to my one and only baby niece (until my sister pops another one out next year).
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Oh, and I should get this out before it hits midnight.
Merry Christmas, everybody!
New Shoes
I am fat.
I have always been fat. I never denied that.
I have been fat since I was 9. And no matter how much weight I gained or lost, I am still fat.
People used it as a weapon against me all the time. Whenever anyone wanna attack or insult me, the first thing they would do is say that I’m fat.
It didn’t do my self-esteem a lot of good, even way back when I was in high school. I was quiet. I did not have a lot of friends because I did not fit in the “popular crowd”. I was bullied because I was fat.
I was like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
All of the other reindeers, used to laugh and call me names. They never let poor Kenny, play in any reindeer games.
That’s alright. I am fat. People call me fat and I deserve it.
It’s not like I have anyone to blame it on.
Who can I blame? My parents for giving me bad genes?
Some people can eat like a horse, drink like a fish, don’t exercise and still remain slim.
I have to watch what I eat strictly and workout 6 times a week like mad just to prevent myself from getting too fat. If I fail to follow that routine for even just one week, I will gain fat. That’s how sensitive my body is.
But that’s ok.
I recognise it as my disability. It is a curse I have to live with. But it doesn’t bother me.
All it means is I have to work extra hard to be on the same level with everyone else.
So be it.
This time last year I made myself a list of New Year’s Resolutions.
One of the items on the list, is to shed 10kg off my body weight.
And so I started exercising regularly. For the past few months I have been hitting the gym almost without fail 3 times a week immediately after work. On top of that, I am alternating between jogging and swimming 45 minutes in the pool everyday.
I began eating all the healthy stuff. Friends who went out with me before would vouch for my strict draconian diet. I gave up a lot of my favourite Kuching food, like kolo mee and laksa. I took the Kenko Diet Plums I got from Cheesie. At the peak of my desperation, I was eating an apple for lunch.
It has been 12 months since I made that resolution.
I was 86kg then.
I am 78kg now.
Just 2kg shy of my target.
Of course, I am still fat lah. I know that I’ll probably never ever be considered slim. Still fat, but just less fat.
Knowing how stubborn my body is, losing the 8kg over the period of 12 months wasn’t that easy.
Without a doubt, the most significant turning point in 2006 was when I did the 42km KL International Marathon. Of all the participants present that day at the starting line, I was definitely the most out of place. I was like the Jack Black among all the Johnny Depps and Angelina Jolies.
And yet I did it, even when it meant limping and literally DRAGGING my two numb legs for the remaining 12km of the race.
I felt like a brand new person when I crossed the finishing line. It wasn’t just because I had achieved a seemingly inhumane feat. It was also the people I meet along the way, like a 73-year-old who finished the race 1.5 hour ahead of me, that inspired me and gave me unlimited confidence boost.
Completing the 42km made me truly believe that nothing is impossible.
Soon after the marathon, I noticed my body underwent serious transformation. Within a month, 4kg worth of fat melted right off my body.
A lot of people e-mailed in asking if I’m participating in future marathons.
Yes, I am.
I can’t lie. I miss the trance I went into after reaching the human threshold 30km into the race. I miss the hit of natural high when I crossed the finishing line. The fact is, I cannot wait to compete in my next marathon. I’m addicted to it.
One of my new year resolutions is take up distance running seriously next year.
I have already started training for my next marathon.
But the shoes I wore for my last one was completely obliterated. I wasn’t ready to replace them since I only had those shoes for less than 2 years.
I did helplessly try to superglue the soles of the shoes back together but the damn thing couldn’t even hold on for a few days before opening its mouth again.
I was walking around in the adidas store at 1 Utama during my last trip to KL and learnt about their ‘Test Run 28’ campaign which I thought was real interesting concept.
If you’re not satisfied for any reason at all within 28 days, the shop will exchange them for another brand new pair from the ‘Test Run 28’ range, no questions asked.
That’s real important because good running shoes always costs so bloody much. Most people don’t know if the shoes really suit them or not until they tried them out in the real world.
It’s been ages since I bought new sports shoes, so I was like a kid in a candy store going through all the choices.
I spotted the adidas Supernova Control and fell in love with it as soon as I slipped them on. It is their latest in their popular Supernova series which has been getting rave reviews from the runners community. A pair of those costs RM499 . That’s the price to pay to get their top-of-the-line technical running shoes.
RM499… that’s like, RM249.50 for each foot. :/
The difference between a RM499 technical shoe and a RM49 one you can get from Bata is that the more expensive adidas is fitted with all the high-end technology a normal person couldn’t care less.
Technology like the Ortholite for its antimicrobial moisture wicking sock lining, 3D Torsion System for mid-foot integerity, Quickstrike for light-weight flexibility, adiWEAR for durable outsoles, adiPRENE for shock absorption and adiPRENE+ for efficient forefoot propulsion.
Oh sorry, did I make you read through all those? 😉
Heh, I wouldn’t even adiBOTHER to adiSTAND all those adiTERMS, adiWISE I will get an adiHEADACHE+ and then I’ll say adiOS.
Still, can’t deny that the new shoes look cool though. 😛 I just love the silver and metallic blue colour combo. It looks darn futuristic.
Anyway, I worn the shoes for a few days now and they feel fantastic. No wonder seasoned runners love these. My ankles don’t hurt as much after running and that’s a good thing if I plan to improve my marathon time in 3 months time.
When you’re running religiously everyday, simple purchases like this can make your feet really happy.
So who’s joining me for my next marathon?
Hide And Seek
Jayden calls me “jiu jiu”. That’s “uncle” in Chinese.
At 3 years old, Jayden doesn’t have a lot of friends of his own to play with. That’s why everytime a new visitor comes around to my sister’s place, he becomes very excited. So excited until he sometimes abandon his own dad.
I am never good with kids. I don’t like them, they don’t like me. But Jayden just adores me.
He adores me so much he even drew a portrait of me.
Ok fine, he made me look like a happy version of the ghost from Ju-On.
But I’m pretty sure he still likes me.
On my last evening in New Zealand, I took Jayden out to this massive supermarket called Woolsworths. It was near closing hours so there wasn’t much customers around except for us.
I was holding Jayden’s little hand when suddenly I just felt a bit mischevious and decided to play an impromptu game of hide-and-seek with the 3-year-old.
First, it was all fun and games. I hid behind the shelves, but Jayden was smart enough to spot where I was going.
So I ran a little bit further.
And hid a little bit faster.
Until I heard somebody cry.
Oops.
At least I bought him chocolates in the end lah.
The Most Awesomest Party Of The Year
If you have something else planned on the 26th November 2006, cancel it.
Yes, this is indeed gonna be the Most Awesomest Birthday Party of the Year™. And the best thing about it is, everyone is invited.
Bloggers, non-bloggers, commenters, lurkers, chatters, friends, families, enemies, long lost classmates, primary school crushes, teachers, colleagues. I don’t care who you are, where you live, if you are reading this right now, YOU ARE INVITED.
If you live in Kuching, drive here. If you live in KL, fly here. If you live in Singapore, swim here. I don’t care how you do it as long as you come. Because you, ALL OF YOU are invited to the Most Awesomest Birthday Party Of The Year™ at the newest hippest bar in town, links.
All I ask is that you please leave a comment or send me an e-mail to tell me that you’re coming by this Tuesday.
It’ll help me determine how much food and drinks to buy. On the night of the party, I will put your name on my guest list and only people from that list is allowed to come in.
No Invitation = No Entry = No Free Drinks = No Party.
Uninvited guests are welcome to hang around till 11:30pm when the doors open for lazy procrastinators like you.
One more thing.
In case you’re thinking of coming with a coconut as a birthday gift for me, DON’T DO IT. It’s not even funny anymore. Unless you want me to throw you off the top of the Civic Centre with that coconut dislodged up your ass.
Now would be funny.
Kirsten Eats Cake
My Very First Online Protest
This is my way for showing my support to French organisation Reporters Without Borders.
For the next 24 hours, there will be no updates on kennysia.com because I am participating in a global online protest against the gross injustice of Internet censorship and the restriction of our freedom of expression.
Don’t delay. Act now!
….
Ok ok fine, I’m just lazy to blog for 24 hours ALRIGHT? 😛