Check out what I got in the mail over the weekend.
It’s a package from Mr Turodrique Fuad, all the way from sunny Singapore. I picked them up from the post office last Saturday.
Look at THAT. Localbrand T-shirts in the mail! Thank you, Turodrique!
If you haven’t heard of Localbrand you probably haven’t been following news from the blogosphere much. Localbrand is a Singaporean-based dare-to-be-different fashion label that launched into limelight earlier this year when they created newswaves by appointing blogger XiaXue as their brand Ambassador.
Localbrand T-shirts are known for their interesting designs and their fondness in using a T-shirt as a media platform to convey subtle messages. They are about non-conformity. They are about self-awareness. They are about the Asian way of life.
These are new designs from Localbrand’s latest collection and Turodrique is nice enough to send me some samples. I’m happy because this is the first time I get something compliments of a fashion label as a result of my blog. 🙂 Besides, it makes my balls grow large knowing I’m the first person in Kuching to own these new Localbrand T-shirts.
To show Localbrand my appreciation, I took these shameless photos of myself posing so they can include them in their new catalogue. Yes Turodrique, you can use these photos free of charge without making me into a brand ambassador or something. Nah, don’t mention it. Heh heh heh.
The t-shirts are really comfy! None of those Giordano bullcrap. These are definitely quality threads. I wear Localbrand with pride so I’m a member of Elite, inc. (And stop staring at my tit.)
Here, I tried to an act-cool while professing my undying love for Annabel Chong.
Alright, enough shilling from me. If you know what’s good for you, go get yourself a Localbrand T-shirt NOW.
When A Good Layout Isn’t Exactly Important
I’m honestly a little bit that surprised my entry on Blogskin Sins received more backlash than expected.
They said:
“Its their website and they can do whatever they want.”
“Its not for you to comment on their blogs. Leave them alone.”
“Even if they committed those ‘Blogskin sins’. I’m still going to read it if the content is good.”
I say:
“True, I’m not saying they have to change their layout just to suit my taste. I’m just saying if they’re hoping the majority will read their blog with that kind of layout, then they can just keep on hoping.”
Who said interesting content is more important than friendly layout? If you haven’t got a good layout, its gonna be difficult trying to read the content anyways.
Example of a badly-made Blogskin.
Well, this entry is dedicated to those who think bad Blogskins is acceptable. The navigation buttons are hidden. Good luck trying to figure out where to click. This is also my site and I can do whatever I want, right?
Enjoy.
They Sell Crayons, I Think
I don’t know what’s with me but I’ve been spotting shops with unusual names these past couple of days.
Take a closer look at the shop name that caught my attention.
Too bad they’re not open. I have a feeling the inside of the shop might looked something like this.
How My Sister Found Out My Blog
Its nice to get an e-mail from Karen Cheng out of the blue today.
Karen is an artist and young mother from Perth. She’s an avid blogger and her blog chronicles her daily life, especially her two little boys. Do check out her blog if you like to read about cute babies and stuff. Her site was nominated for the 2005 Bloggie Awards as the Best Designed Blog and its not difficult to see why.
If only Blogskin designers are willing to learn a thing or two from her, wars would end, birds would sing, George Bush would step down from presidency, and the world would be a much better place.
Karen worked in Singapore as an expat sometime before. I guess that’s why she follows the Singaporean blogosphere and that’s how she found out about my blog. What she didn’t know is that she’s friends with my sister from their Uni days. I knew about Karen Cheng because once my sis showed me Karen’s site, telling me she wanted a website like that for her two kids as well. She didn’t know I have a blog back then.
So one day, my sis was surfing Karen’s site for inspiration, clicking the links she had on her side bar when she encountered this post on Mr Miyagi’s site.
Sis: “Eh? What’s my brother doing in there?”
Talk about the worst possible way for a family member to find out your blog.
Blogskin Sins
Every now and again, I’d do a bit of surfing to find out new and interesting blogs I could add to my bookmarks. There’s a lot of good blogs out there and its easy to be impressed not just by the quality of their content, but also the amazing design and layout some of these blogs have.
A lot of blogs use templates from Blogskins.com, and surprisingly many of these templates were done by 13-15 year olds. Seriously, their web design skills kicked my ass so hard, they made me looked as if I designed kennysia.com half-heartedly with my mouse clenched between my buttcheeks.
But those are the good ones. The bad ones, mannnn… they’re not just bad, they’re nauseating. If anyone reading this is using these skins on their blogs, don’t worry I’m not dissing you. Your content may be good, but PLEASE, do yourself a favour, give yourself a tight slap across the face and change the skin lah!
Here are some of the worst sins a Blogskin designer could commit.
1. Don’t force us to listen to your crappy music.
Blogs with background music are as invasive as having a stranger sticking his finger up your nose. If we want to listen to music while blogsurfing we’d have played Winamp. And if Winamp was playing when we dropped by your page, we’d be forced to listen to a collaborative remix between Norah Jones and The Crazy Frog.
Come on! Why would anyone have MP3s that autoload on their blog? There’s even this skin that autoplays a whole freaking music video. It’s annoying, it catches us by surprise, and by the time your blog finished sucking up all our bandwidth we would have reached for the bright red ‘X’ button on the window because we couldn’t find where THAT GODFORSAKEN STOP BUTTON IS LOCATED ON YOUR WEBSITE.
2. My screen is 1280×1024. Your entries are in a 40×100 frame.
Blog entries written in frames effectively kill the use of my mouse’s scroll wheel, but generally I’m still quite cool with that.
The blog entries are all in that little frame there. All the surrounding spaces = wasted.
Lately though, the frames been getting smaller and smaller and the background images (ranges from anime characters to random girl in provocative poses to some lame-ass celebrity like Britney or Avril Lavigne) just keep getting bigger and bigger. It comes to the point I’m staring at this picture and the blog entry constitutes just 10% of the my entire screen’s area. Worst of all, these entries are usually written in xxx-small fonts and in colours so bright they could make a blind man see again.
Please. We’re here to read your words, not look at your stupid background images.
3. Hidden buttons are not cool, they’re irritating.
Cute, but… dude, where’s the blog?
It’s bad enough having to click an extra button just to get to your profile, links, tag-board, entries. You could at least make our lives easier by TELLING US WHERE THOSE BUTTONS ARE.
4. This wouldn’t have happened if they’re told the readability of their fonts is related to the size of their balls.
Sometimes I think these people design websites not for humans, but for ants to visit.
Try reading this without leaning forward.
How the heck am I supposed to read these words? I practically have to kiss the computer screen to be able to read what they wrote. Yes I know I can manually set my fonts bigger, but why should I? For God’s sakes, make your fonts larger.
I just want to read your blog, not go for a bloody eye examination.
Finally, to be bloglitically-correct, I must say this, “Its your blog and you can to do whatever you want.” 🙂
Malaysia’s National Service Program
I read with interest Jolene‘s account of her life at the Malaysian National Service (NS) training camp. Believe it or not, growing record-breaking armpit hair, camp trainers chasing away ‘evil spirits’, kissing your used sanitary pads as a form of punishment (wtf?) – its all part and parcel of being an NS trainee.
Our very own Jolene Lai, proudly serving the nation as a blue zebra.
When I first heard that Malaysia is about to implement the NS regime, I was very supportive of it. I believe that so long as it’s for a just cause, improving our national security and instilling patriotism in our youths is always a good thing.
I wouldn’t mind being part of the NS program myself because I heard girls think men in uniforms are sexy and I wanted to wear one. I’ve had plenty of friends from Singapore and Taiwan who ranted and raved about what a life-changing experience NS was for them and how they came out in the end a better person.
For many, NS is a rite of passage where the clueless becomes disciplined, the weak becomes strong, the boys become men.
The difference is in the balls.
Unfortunately, as more details emerge, I started to grow skepticism.
For one, the program is only going to benefit 20% of the country’s 17-year-olds (money not enough). Then I learnt that duration of the NS is not 2 years, not even 1 year, but just 3 months (money not enough). THREE PATHETIC MONTHS! Many people have said it – three months ain’t National Service to train boys into men. Three months is summer camp for kids.
How the heck are you going to instill patriotism in just 3 months? These things don’t just grow on trees overnight. Patriotism is something that require the victims to be subjected to lies and deception and propaganda over a long long period of time one, you know?
I reckon the only way they’re able to effectively instill patriotism in the minds of our youths is by using some bizzare mind-control technique.
What really went on behind-the-scenes during NS.
Jolene wrote about having to attend racial integration classes. Its fun and nice and all, but in a way, its also quite sad to see that the country has to resort to programs like these to promote racial harmony among the Chinese, Indians and Malays. I’m no expert, but I do know that forcing cross-cultural interaction in a formal classroom-like environment is about as effective as forcing a chicken and a duck to talk about the latest EPL soccer news.
Its only gonna work during supervised sessions. As soon as that’s over, the Chinese is gonna stick with their Chinese friends and likewise for the other major races. Most of them anyway. For many, a comfortable common language is still a barrier for interaction to take place.
But hey, at least they’re trying.
The biggest joke of all is that the Malaysian National Service isn’t providing any military training at all. Heck, the trainees aren’t even given the chance to handle weapons! All that pretty army uniforms and they don’t even get to hold a gun. What the hell, right? I wonder why the Ministry of Defence is running the program ‘cos all these “racial integration” and “character building” exercises seem more like the Education Ministry’s job.
There are military drills. Its just that at most, the trainees are taught to climb ropes, do monkey bars, and run. But geez, what are these kids gonna do if Malaysia came under attack? Throw sticks at them?
Yes, I feel very safe.
(Just in case there’s any government people reading this who thinks I’m criticising Malaysia’s NS program, I’m not lah ok? I think Malaysia is good, and I agree Badawi is the best thing since Elvis. Yeah, baby.)
Wood Yew Laik To Bai Som Bif?
Poor dude. He needs to get his money back from whoever made this sorry-ass signboard for him.
Poor signboard maker. He needs to seek out his primary school English teacher and ask for a tight slap across his face.
I don’t think there’s another signboard out there with more spelling mistakes than this one.
I Want To Go Back To Perth
This was one of the toughest questions posed to me during my “Ask Me Anything” stunt for the Blogathon charity. (Btw, have you sent in your donation?)
(From aunty@uncle.com)
Hey Kenny,
I’m wondering if you’re coming back to Perth, as in “semi-permanently”. I’m guessing here, but you’ve got Australian permanent residency right? I’m just wondering if you are considering coming back to Perth. Or, even to Melbourne or Sydney or Adelaide. Or UK.
I know this is a bit personal. But the main reason you left Perth is because of family-related reasons (I’m sorry about that), but now that everything is settling down, would you consider leaving Kuching again?
As a third person, who doesn’t know you, I think Kuching is not the place for you. I can sense that you enjoyed the (8) years in Perth a lot and it brings you lots of good memories. I strongly think that you’d be better off in Perth.
What do you think?
I just got off from a pretty good chat with Nicole via Skype last night. These days, such nice conversations between us are rare. In the past when I talked to her, it felt as if the emotional distance between us is catching up with the physical distance between us.
Its no secret that I like Perth and I miss Perth. Its difficult not to. Once upon a time, I had a fantastic job doing what I like. I was earning a handsome AUD$40k pa salary, I enjoyed my Saturday nights drinking coffee with friends, and I got to work out at Fitness First instead of Gym Masyarakat.
Of course it is unfair to compare Perth with Kuching – I’m not trying to do that. Kuching is my home, it will always be my home and it will always be the place I return to eventually. However at 23 years old I have a thirst for adventure and a hunger for knowledge.
Kuching would be where I want to be if I’m 30 years old, married with a wife and two kids, tied down with commitments and looking for some stability in life. It’s just not the place I belong to when I’m still 23 years old with all the freedom in the world and the energy of a young bull.
But I HAD to leave Perth. I’d blame myself for the rest of my life if I didn’t. I have only one father, and to be by his side for the remainder of his life is the least I could do as his son. THE LEAST.
I HAD to be here for my mother, otherwise she’d be all alone.
I HAD to work in my current profession eventhough I didn’t like it, nor am I ready for it. I must be lying through my teeth if I said I enjoyed my job. But I HAD to. I was in no position to debate with my father when he was lying on the bed and I was standing there healthily. I HAD to let my father see that I’m helping him achieve his goals before he closed his eyes forever.
Don’t get me wrong, I do not hate my job. But settling down on this stable desk job is what I would do a few more years down the track, not right now. Now that I’m already in this position, I cannot leave. I have to stay and learn the ropes in this business, because the people who are gonna show me the ropes are not gonna be around forever. Its now or never.
I HAD to leave Nicole. I’m not talking about leaving your girlfriend for a few months, come back again and then start living life like a normal couple again. If that’s the case, I can live with that.
I’m talking about being away from your partner, possibly for the rest of your life. For the rest of your life. That, I CANNOT live with. Who in their right mind would want to be in a perpetual long distance relationship? This is not a scene out of The Notebook, this is real life.
The dilemma I’m facing is that we ARE in a committed relationship, but we’re not committed enough to give up our position to be physically next to each other. I cannot leave Kuching, and she’d be stupid to give up Perth to live in Kuching. Don’t even talk about marriage – its an impossibility as neither of us are ready for that. At least, not yet.
The worst thing about this is that when I left Perth, we didn’t exactly leave on good terms (we were in that we-need-to-give-each-other-personal-space kinda stage), and that’s how we ended up in a half-fucked relationship right now that’s neither committed nor uncommitted, neither serious nor casual, neither short-term nor everlasting.
I hated it when people asked me what my plans with Nicole are, and I had to reply “I don’t know.” The truth is, I really don’t know. I asked my mother when I had this discussion with her what’s going to happen to me and Nicole, and she replied “There’s nothing much you can do about it.” She’s right.
Had I thought of breaking up completely? Yes I had. But both of us agreed that its such a waste for a 4-year-long relationship to go down the drain, not because we stopped loving each other, but because of circumstances. That said, I sometimes wonder if the way we are right now that we’re holding onto nothing, if we’re better off seeing someone else than to waste our youthful years on each other. But I relented.
It’s situations like these that made me feel so confused about my direction in life.
I want to go back to Perth so I can save up money to travel to Europe and backpack and see the world before settling down permanently in Kuching. I want to go back to Perth so Nicole and I can live like a normal couple once again.
I want to go back to Perth, yet I cannot bear to do such a selfish act. I’m tied down by my duty to my parents as their son, my responsibilities to my late father as his torchbearer.
Nouvo Club Review
This is yet another very old entry from my trip to KL once upon a time in a land far, far away. I actually completely forgotten about writing this entry until nal1210 made a passing comment to my by e-mail that she saw me before, and she saw me at Nouvo.
Situated on the corner of Jalan Ramlee and Jalan Sultan Ismail, Nouvo is one of the most popular dance clubs in KL. The sexily architectured building is a landmark by itself right in the middle of the Golden Triangle’s busiest nightspot. Nouvo shares the same building with Sangria, a R&B/hiphop club. I ventured down there the night after the PPS Bash to check out the hot chicas the nightlife our nation’s capital has to offer.
Coincidentally there’s a party going on that night.
VIPs get to enter for free before 11pm. I got my free invite from Juice Magazine but I arrived 30 mins too late. That 30 mins proved to be costly as I had to pay RM30 to enter the club.
I was kinda loitering outside the club around a bit hoping some kind soul would bring me in for free. But heh, fat chance. I succumbed to the fact that the chances of being recognised was too slim and I paid my way in instead.
The inside of Nouvo is stylish, clean and elegant. Its very spacious. There’s chandeliers and disco balls and the number 3s (its Juice magazine’s 3rd anniversary) hanging from the ceiling.
The large dance floor area is located right in front of the DJ booth and comfy lounge chairs are scattered surrounding the dance floor and on the second floor. The setting reminded me very much of Metropolis Perth.
House Music and Drum ‘n Bass seem to be the musical theme for the night.
I was disappointed to see that the club was quite empty. Its probably only 40% full. There’s no one dancing. People there just seem content enough to huddle around the bars, beer in hand, staring at an empty dance floor. Geez, what’s wrong with you people?
It looks like all the action was in the VVIP room on the second floor. That’s where all the friends and employees of Juice magazine were congregating. I didn’t know if I was allowed inside the VVIP room or not, but I walked past the bouncers confidently nonetheless and helped myself to some cakes and free drinks. 🙂
kennysia.com believes in the principle that if you’re not invited to an event, you can always invite yourself.
I was happily working my camera away when I heard someone yelled “KENNY! OMG ITS KENNY! KENNY SIA IS HERE!” very excitedly.
Seems like someone do recognise me after all. (Damn, I’ve already paid my RM30)
This is Azhar. He reads kennysia.com. Hi Azhar!
A friend of his helped me take this photo. Later he passed my camera to Azhar, then uttered the most ridiculous line I’ve ever heard. “Aiya I dunno who you are lah, but you look like a celebrity anyway so I’ll take a photo with you lah.”
Gee, thanks.
KL girls in the club were game enough to pose for my camera. Some of them even fingered me and asked me to take photos of them. I wasn’t even using a huge professional SLR or anything like that, just a standard digicam.
These girls probably think they’re gonna end up in Juice mag. Too bad they just ended up on crappy kennysia.com. Sorry!
There’s something odd about this picture.
1. What’s a Muslim lady doing in a dance club? Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought it’s haram for Muslims to work in entertainment outlets? (I’m asking a question, not condemning the act lah ok?)
2. Sweeping away rubbish while a party was still in progress? That’s like rearranging the deckchairs on the Titanic.
As the night dragged on, only the Juice people (Juicy people?) were left in an almost empty club. Finally there were people on the dance floor. A short unedited video clip of the night can be downloaded here (Quicktime MOV, 9MB).
Some decided to do away with the glasses and took drinking to a whole new level.
And some were clearly not up for it.
Carlsberg – 1 Man – 0
The DJ played Akon’s Mr Lonely at 3am to let people know the club was shutting down. I don’t know why they played Mr Lonely. Probably its to tell us that the lucky guys had already left with the girls, and the guys remaning in the club are all Mr Lonely.
All your ladies are belong to Darth Vader.
To their credit, the DJ was good and the music playing that night was excellent, but I didn’t feel like I enjoyed myself that night. The energy from the crowd just wasn’t there. Perhaps it was a Friday night. Perhaps everyone had gone to either Zouk or Bangsar or Hartamas for their clubbing needs. Whatever it was I doubt I’ll be heading back to Nouvo anytime soon.
Where’s the hot nightspot in KL?
The Most Patriotic Malaysian Car Ever
Here’s a guy that deserves a place in the Malaysia’s Book of Records.
This is the kind of car that would make the my balls swell to three times their original size. Seriously, how could ANY Malaysian NOT be proud of a car like this?
I bet the car stereo is playing Negaraku when he’s driving.
The guy’s got so many flags on his car that if he ever gets killed in a car crash, the country is gonna give him a Hero’s burial.
Man, I’m proud to be Malaysian. I shall go tattoo the Malaysian flag on my back right now.