David Tao Showcase – Live in Kuching 2005

Last evening I had the opportunity to attend the David Tao Concert… sorry… Showcase that’s held in the MBKS Indoor Stadium in Pending. The major sponsor of this event was Maxis Hotlink. The deal was: if you purchase a Hotlink startup SIM pack for RM30, you’ll get 6 tickets to the Showcase, as well as 20% off the latest David Tao CD. The reason why its called ‘Showcase’ and not ‘Concert’ is an important one, as I found out why when the evening progressed.
David Tao 'Showcase' ticket

The David Tao ‘Showcase’ ticket that I bought from an opportunistic passerby.

I can’t be bothered paying RM30 for six tickets as I have no plans of bringing 5 of my non-existent Kuching friends to come with me. All I want is one ticket for myself, so I showed up at the stadium hoping to do just that. I had no luck, as the Hotlink salesperson insisted that that I sign up for their prepaid card and get six tickets. Finally, someone with spare tickets offered to sell me one of his for RM10, so I obliged.
Enemy at the gates?

HELLOOOO… aren’t you supposed to be, like, saving the world?

The first thing that caught my eye as soon as I arrived in the stadium is the presence of military personnel. I’m not talking about the 5 or 6 of them that’s directing the traffic outside the stadium. I’m talking about a total of about 50 of them inside and outside the stadium! For a moment, I thought I was attending a concert by Mahathir.
How many military pesonnel

Count how many military personnel is in this picture. No prizes for correct guesses.

The second thing that caught my eye was the crowd in attendance. There was nothing, NOTHING that can prepare me for the horror that I had to witness. This event shouldn’t even be called a David Tao Showcase. It should be called the AhBeng-AhLian Fashion Showcase.
Behold, the latest in Kuching fashion…

The pink panthers!
The pink panthers!

The skinny-ass gangster-wannabe!
The skinny-ass gangster-wannabe! (aka la-la zhai)

The Ayumi Hamasaki-wannabe
The Ayumi Hamasaki-wannabe! (aka la-la loui)

And my personal favourite…

The embroidered quarter-pants!
The embroidered quarter-pants!

Faces have been pixelated or cropped to protect the ‘innocent’ (or was that the ‘guilty’) party.

The concert/showcase was supposed to start at 8pm. I went in there around 7:30pm hoping to get a good spot since its free-seating/standing, but alas, the stadium was already half-full. Nonetheless, with my handsome good looks, I managed to charm my way to the front, about 4 rows from the barricade.
Some teenage girls told me that they’ve been waiting since 6:30pm. If these kids go to school with the same enthusiasm they have coming to this event, their parents would be proud. The place was so packed and the air was so humid. As I waited among the crowd I was already sweating profusely. I thought I’d never complain about being surrounded by teenage girls, but mannnn… that night I was just hoping that those girls would leave me alone!
Fan with fan

Fans with the hands

Looking at the above picture, you must be thinking that the fans were going wild because David Tao just came on stage. Well, you are wrong. The big-ass cardboard “hands” provided by Maxis were used to fan the fans (err..?) themselves.
That DJ who can't cheer Kuching people up.

That DJ who can’t cheer Kuching people up.

The time was about 8:15pm but there were still no signs of the popular Taiwanese singer. Instead, we were treated to some monologue by a DJ from 98.8FM (which I never listen to), who tried to get the crowd going wild, with no success. Kuching people are made of wood I tell you.
Then came the stupidest, most time-wasting, most horrible part of the evening. The DJ tried to get people from the crowd to come on stage to play a game. After a good 20 minutes trying to get people with names like “Catherine”, or “David” up on stage, she ended up with five guys. The game? Each of them must sing a 2-minute snippet of a song from David Tao’s latest album, and the crowd will be the judge of their performance.
Total time waster.

Yes, they are reading lyrics off the album cover. Yes, its a coincidence 3 of them wore sleeveless. Yes, their singing was absolutely horrible. Simon Cowell would be proud.

For obliterating our eardrums and causing us mental instability, the DJ rewarded the five of them with prizes from Maxis Hotlink. I managed to catch up with one of the contestants after the show (Vincent, the guy on the extreme right), and he showed me what he received. A cardboard hand, a poster, a Maxis writing pad, a Maxis brochure, another Maxis brochure, all in a crappy Maxis paper bag. Not a mobile phone, not a sim card, not even a bloody CD. Those tight-ass selfish wankers.
David Tao appeared on stage

David Tao appeared on stage after much wait.

After another bout of trying to get us cheer David Tao’s name, the famed artist himself appeared on stage. He wore a pink Abercombie & Fitch T-shirt, slim fit tattered jeans, and a white belt so feminine I reckon Nicole would look good in it. I’m sorry girls, I like his music as well, but I just don’t see the physical appeal of this Taiwanese singer. You call him metrosexual, I call him a guy who had forgotten to pack his testicles from Taiwan.
David Tao in Kuching

David Tao singing ‘Ai Wo Hai Shi Ta’

David Tao’s first song on stage was ‘Ai Wo Hai Shi Ta?’ (literally “Do you love me or him?”). Let’s just say I was expecting a live band or something. The last two concerts I’d been to in Perth (Craig David and Vanessa Amorosi) both performed with live bands, and this one just disappoints. The vocal was good, but the background music was flat. It was just a glorified Karaoke show.
David Tao in Kuching

David Tao singing ‘Susan said’

David Tao’s second song on stage was ‘Susan Said’, which is one of my favourite songs on the new album. If you’ve heard the song before, you’d recognise that there’s a falsetto portion of the song followed by a rap which was really well done. (A ‘falsetto’ is when a guy deliberately make his pitch higher than usual in singing). The song itself was good, but when it came to David Tao doing the falsetto, I could see him struggling when he smiled nervously. I heard two voices, which led me to believe that the falsetto portion of the song was recorded into the Karaoke track. I was disappointed. He did the rap pretty good though.
David Tao’s third song… wait, that’s it. That’s the end of the singing. Two songs. Yes, my friends, and that’s the difference between a ‘Showcase’ and a ‘Concert’. After all that waiting, standing, squeezing with hundreds of sweaty teenage girls, and putting up with horrible singing from the five guys… what did I get? Two sucky Karaoke-fied songs. You know a concert is crap when the pre-show games lasted longer than the actual singing itself.
David Tao autographed

How I wasted a rare close-up photo of David Tao with my shaky hands.

The rest of the evening was allocated for the autograph session. The DJ emphasised that only the outer cardboard cover of the latest CD or cassette will be signed. Nothing else. Clearly that’s to promote his CD sales. But even if I have bought the CD and asked to have him sign the poster, the security… sorry, I meant military personnel wouldn’t let me. I have no idea why, but I’m not stupid enough to argue with our army men. No cameras were allowed on stage as well, but I managed to snap a blurry picture of David Tao close-up before 5 soldiers tackled and escorted me away.
David Tao autographed album

My autographed David Tao album is now for sale. RM50.

I did manage to get David Tao’s autograph on the CD. I bought it for RM35 on the day of the event. Then I thought… why the hell am I putting myself through all the crap just to get this stupid CD? This is a concert… I mean, showcase that wasted a good 2.5 hours of my life with 2 bloody songs! Its an event I’d rather forget. Which is why I am now putting this CD for sale, RM50, registered postage included to all parts of Malaysia/Singapore. ๐Ÿ™‚
Anyway, I actually lined up again after the crowd subsided. I was hoping that if I’m the last few person, David Tao might actually be so kind as to pose for a photo with me. No such luck. I asked him politely “Wo Ke Yi Gen Ni Pai Yi Zhang Zao Ma?” (Can I have a photo with you please?). He said “Dui Bu Chi, Wo Bu Neng” (Sorry, I can’t). And before I knew it, I was tackled and escorted off stage again.
With nothing left to see or do, I went home. Meanwhile, I can sleep soundly, safe from the knowledge that in the event that my home country of Malaysia was invaded, the first thing our troops do would be to stage a live concert.
Malaysian army
May God bless them.

34 Replies to “David Tao Showcase – Live in Kuching 2005”

  1. aww mate… that’s such a slack effort (if you could call it an effort) what? TWO semi-songs? Susan Shuo is hot, but damn if it ain’t genuine, then gee… Ah well, at least you know better now. Let’s hope the Black Eyed Peas tour Kuching. They kick ass. =)

  2. ahah those supposed ‘soldiers’ sorta stole the limelight uh.. well look at the 1st pic.. OMG a lance corporal. no wait, a short fattyass corporal and these are the ppl who will be defending our motherland from invasion.
    btw on 2nd thot, those lalamuis have nice legs. *salivates*

  3. I was there too, no wonder a saw this familiar guy with his digicam snapping others away. Luckily, u weren’t whacked for taking thier pictures so secretively, and man, this ain’t Perth…..

  4. good to see you had fun. =)
    this will teach u not to ‘tan1 xiao3 pian2 yi2’ lah. what you pay is what you get.
    but there’s this concert i wanna go here, Forces of Nature – damn expensive though so i’m not. plus it’s too far. funny thing abt the ad on tv is that among all the groups tht are gonna be in it – BoyzIIMen, Black Eyed Peas etc..they’re using BSB on their tv commercial. Ai Hun.

  5. Bek – I actually liked the Black Eyed Peas, until they repeated “Let’s Get It Started” (or was it “Get Retarded”) on the radio one tooooo many times. I’d still like to see them live though.
    MunKit – I think most of those soldiers are kids doing their National Service, come to think of it. I’m just not too sure why they’re doing their national service at a ‘showcase’ even organised by a telco company.
    Koh Lee Onn, I risked and sacrificed a lot of things for this website. ๐Ÿ˜ You’re never gonna understand…
    Kim – Exactly. I thought it was too good to be true. But 10 minutes of actual singing is bad lah, especially after all the hype. They might as well save the time and effort and don’t bring him here in the first place.
    And… Backstreet Boys? Aren’t they like 40 years old now?
    Victoria, whattttt…
    killarkai, David Beckham forgot to pack his testicles from England as well?

  6. Oh Kenny u at kch also! i was there as well that night. but i sat at the back row. can’t see very clarly on the DJ n David’s face, only can see a small blur figure.

  7. well.. in actual fact he spent less time than u guys who spent HOURS there. no loss on his part =) publicity bah.

  8. DOWN WITH DAVID TAO
    DOWN WITH DAVID TAO
    hey kenny, i think u’re wrong bout leaving his testicles back in Taiwan. i think he’d lost it since he was born. he doees look sissy!
    so far so good with his ‘concert’.
    next time, try his enemy’s real CONCERT–Jay Chou!!!
    yeah yeah!!!! love him!

  9. Hey dude, you are right about David left his testicles in TW, that’s why he can sing in falsetto, ever hear of Castrato ? Musical term for choir men/boys who went thru castration to retain the ability to sing high pitch notes.

  10. *LOL* I think I was having quite a cultural shock too when I went back to Kuching for a holidays. Seeing the latest fashions. Duh~ eyesore. Hey, sold off your David Tao CD oledi? Should target those crazy for David Tao mui mui. ๐Ÿ˜›

  11. I like David Tao, but I heard he’s actually DAO as hell. Don’t care, download his songs or rip it off someone!

  12. hehe.. i went for the penang version of the david tao SHOWCASE.. me being a total die hard fan, enjoyed it completely.. but he sang like 3 to 4 songs and had some short acapellas in between.. and i was right in the first row after the barricade!! totally loved him more and was smitten to the max!! thanks for this amusic blog kenny!!

  13. And obviously you can’t write, with correct grammar, anyway. *smirks* Tell me, how do you roll one eye?

  14. jay chou rocks. and bsb is still good. lol. who cares if they are old. damn, what a hater you are, kenny. they are about music. gosh.

  15. Hey everyone here – I chanced upon this webpage and find it pretty interesting – all I can say to you – Kenny I think, stop being such a cheapo, if you want to enjoy the real thing – just pay more and go to David’s concert, you’ll be blasted by his music

  16. a recent made fan of david…..can’t speak a word of mandarin …. but love it anyways
    was just lookin around fer stuff on david tao and stumbled on this site….. i’ve never laughed so hard….am thouroughly entertained !!! LMAO

  17. that’s the trent for asian showcase performances . .
    a lot of karaoke with a little of dancing . . .
    nothing live at all . ..
    totally sucks this music scene !

  18. Erm, yo bro, the reason why he didnt let u take picture with him might be because he is not allowed to, or if you did the remaining whole bunch of people would want too and he cant be ” pian1 xin1″ and just take with you right? so if he took with all of them, what time will he finish? probably like 4 hours later.
    And this isnt a concert ya? so why expect so much songs? for rm10 you want a live band? you must me joking. you got pretty much what rm10 gets you. This sounds like a mini showcase + autograph session to me and you cant expect him to sing so many songs? If you want that maybe you can go for his real concert. He held one in singapore and it totally rocks. So try being in his shoes before you anyhow bring people down.

  19. hmm.. intrestingly funny.. miraculously found my way here.. i went for the ‘showcase’ in sunway tho..i must say i was blown away by his vocals.. but he sang a whole lot more of songs than he did in kuching.. about ten i guess! super cool singer. he rocks my socks!

  20. FYI – David Tao is coming to Toronto Canada. Sounds like something to get as far away from as possible
    Air Canada Centre proudly presents
    DAVID TAO LOVE CAN LIVE 07
    Thursday, March 29, 2007 at 8:00pm
    Ticket Prices: $69.75 – $109.75 (+handling fees)
    That’s a lot of money for 2 songs. I could feed a child in Africa for 3 months…

  21. David Tao rocks!!! jay chow sucks!!! y? how can a singer who cant sing rocks?! I been to DT’s showcases & concerts, what can i say, he is the best chinese male artist i ever knew. jay chow?! pui!!! this fello is the one that polluted our chinese music industry. cant sing, looks ugly, damn commercial, semi-talented but album sell like hell. damn pity our chinese music industry..

  22. “That’s a lot of money for 2 songs”
    the Toronto show will be a full (2 and a half hours?) concert with band, as opposed to the Kuching showcase – completely different – not to be missed

  23. his concerts are full everywhere. and i would say the most worthy to attend. but do get prepared; dont expect to see glamour, huge & beatiful stage; dont expect beautiful & shinning clothes; dont expect DT to show u his body & muscles as well and also, dont expect hot dancing session. sorry, DT say no to all these unneccessary & commercial elements that make a concert crappy.
    one thing for sure u can expect-> true music, quality concert & warm atmosphere.

  24. Look, Kenny, I love your blog and everything, but like my name said, HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE A BSB FAN SCORNED!! They are not 40 years old, Goddamnit! The oldest, Howie (used to be Kevin but he quitted), is just 34! The youngest, Nick, is just God damned TWO years older than you(for those who can’t count, Nick’s 28)!

  25. Thanks for taking the time to discuss this, I feel strongly about it and love learning more on this topic. If possible, as you gain expertise, would you mind updating your blog with more information? It is extremely helpful for me.

  26. Thanks for taking the time to discuss this, I feel strongly about it and love learning more on this topic. If possible, as you gain expertise, would you mind updating your blog with more information? It is extremely helpful for me.

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