I suffer from an incurable disease. Its called Datuknametoolongitis.
Datuknametoolongitis is typically characterised by the sufferer’s inability to remember people’s names in full, especially that of the Datuks. At best the sufferer can absorb the first three syllables of the name. Anything after that becomes pure gibberish.
Jalan Datuk what-what-what?
Kuching, my hometown, is a city that discriminates victims of Datuknametoolongitis, like me. I’m saying that because 70% of the roads here are named after famous people, most of whom are Datuks, some of whom have unfortunately very very long names.
Many years ago I remember studying at a Chinese Primary School along Pineapple Road, not too far from Palm Road. I remember a Jalan Keretapi (Train Road) near Wisma Saberkas. There’s even a oddly named Jalan Central Barat (Central West Road), which is a strange fusion of Malay and English words.
Jalan Rambutan. One of the few old road that retained its name. No there’s no Jalan Coconuts.
I then travelled to Perth Australia where I stayed for eight years growing accustomed to road names like Hay Street where I do my shopping, and James Street where there’s good bubble tea, great coffee and fantastic pubs at night. The longest road name I’ve came across is probably Sir Charles Court Promenade, which is more of a walkway on campus than a road.
And then I return to Kuching. And I experienced reverse culture shock.
There are some changes with Kuching that I can put up with. Then there are some that I cannot.
One road, two names. One new, one old. Kinda defeats the purpose of changing its name isn’t it?
Gone was Jalan Central Barat, its now Jalan Tan Sri Ong Kee Hui. Gone were Palm Road and Jalan Keretapi, its now Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce.
I have nothing against their names. I don’t even know who the heck they are. But I’m sure at one point or another probably they did something so magnificient the city council decided to name a road after them. Then another. And another. And one more. Then another…
As if remembering long and complicated names wasn’t difficult enough for sufferers of Datuknametoolongitis like me, I was further punished by having to differentiate between two almost similar road names.
Two roads, similar names. But the difference is day and night.
Its not that I didn’t try remembering the names. Believe me, I tried. Its very difficult to know the names by heart. One trick I find very useful is to associate the road name with food.
Doing so helps me remember long road names, but makes me hungry very easily.
Its too bad some road names are a bit too long for me to use that trick.
Umm… Jalan Murtabak?
Then they start naming the roundabouts after these famous people.
Try reading them double fast without pausing.
How bad can this get? I thought those were the worst, I have no idea.
Until I came face to face… with The Mother of All Long Roundabout Names.
DOUBLE the “Datuk”, DOUBLE the “Abang Haji”, DOUBLE THE OOMPH!!!
Its not true what they said about Sarawakians living on trees you know. That’s not what we’re famous for.
We’re famous for giving road directions to tourists.
Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.
The library is just on your left. Any questions?”
Angmoh tourist: “Huh?”
The Majlis Perbandaran Kuching sure got nothing better to do. -lol- Even roundabouts are given names. Strangely, I don’t see that in Malacca or my hometown – Tampin. Heh~! I wonder if there’s any roundabout named after Sultan of Brunei. The name of the sultan is freaking long, about 20 words if not mistaken.
ROTFLMAO! Thank you for making me proud to be a Malaysian.
Wah…. lucky I dont live or drive there , by the time I read those signs I would have crashed into them
Wah… heng i lived in Singapore and now the UK, where road names have always been simple, apart from French name roads… at times pronouncing it makes me Salivate so much i practically spit/shower the listener as i pronounce.
Waliew!!! With road names as long as this, who needs maps?! No space liao!
What for name roads so long?! So hard to navigate?! Puiz! But hor, at least Kuching’s signages are more obvious and prominent than in frigging Johor. No signs or rotting away behind a tree. Got lost so many times. ARGH!
LMFAO. I’M SPEECHLESS. ROTFLMFAO!!
goddamn.. didn’t know kuching has such kick ass road names… *laughs*
on another note, jalan teh o peng n mana laksa rawks. the should be roads named after malaysian food instead of dead people with names so friggin long, nobody bothers to remember them, hur hur hur…
Kenny..Kenny… Remind me not to stray into your blog in the wee hours of morning. I laughed so hard, my dad woke up, eyes half-opened, yet he looked armed-n-ready to fight off whatever ‘being’ that disturbs his family. All he saw was my silhouette against the flickering comp screen. Tsk..tsk…
I’m Malay and I sure am struggling with all those blardee long, inhumane names. I personally think that it’s very cruel of the city council to torture the residents with such nonsense. Heh.
But then again, do you consider submitting this to the Guiness World Book of Records for the longest (and probably most complicated) name for a mere roundabout???
Hey!! dint know u stayed in Perth for so long. Indeed i dread going to malaysia because the road names are always so long and difficult to remember
-sporean studying in perth-
And here I was complaining abt unoriginal names that are pretty damn comfusing… like san jose street in san francisco… california street in chicago….
After reading this, I have come to my senses. Better confusing-but-short names than the kind you mentioned here.
Maybe you should take gingko biloba pills for your condition. =)
LOL. Nice entry!
Weird road/street names man.
Wonder how those cab drivers gonna suffer.
Now i feel fortunate staying in Singapore.
Nice post.
But by the way, what does an ang moh tourist want to go to a library for?
Goodness gracious me. I can’t recall bumping into a street / road with a name longer than three syllables for a long time, and that’s a good thing in my opinion. Nice and simple does it.
omg kenny, i just love your site, was recommended it by a friend!!
and yes i totally agree with the road names, it can be so confusing (although i have never seeen that long names before, kuching must be a tough place to live in)
keep up the good work, and thanks for making me smile!
ROFL hahahahahhahahaha… Thx Kenny, I just woke up and the first thing is to check ur site out! HAHA… I know i’ll have a great day… Super Funny Post! Kenny I LOVE YOU la~ I’m from JB studying in Melbourne, glad JB’s road name is not that bad. ;]
Have a nice day, Kenny and Kenny’s Fans~!
Kwang
omg, that last one is unbelievable!!
hi kenny thanks for stopping by my site… really la… name so long for what purpose??
they could have split up the guy’s name & his dad’s name (surname) to name 2 separate roads if both had made some contribution to the city’s development. otherwise just use the first name.
i think if i ever go to kuching, i’m going to have a major headache with the road names. thanks for the advance warning… i shall remember to bring along my panadols 😀
you forgot to mention that some roads are related to each other, eg: jalan ong tiang swee and jalan ong kee hui (cant remember if they have datuk or tan sri… really, can you blame me?)
haha i cant remember those name either. jus gimme landmark and ill be fine. usually SHOPPING places =p
mmm the name of my lorong is
JALAN DURIAN BURUNG = JALAN DURIAN BIRD?
huh?
Haha..I’m a Kuchingnite and I also notice these weird roundabout names in out Kuching City North for quite sometimes. Finally someone is there to point out this ridiculuos way of naming the roundabouts. But the one that caught my attention is the Mother of all Long Roundabout Name, with our Sarawak Parliament Building behind. Should have entered M’sia Book of Record, since Malaysians always aim to break some funny funny records.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!! Brilliant, absolutely brilliant!
Hahaha…My home in Johor is actually at Jalan Rambutan 🙂
Studying & working in Kuching for 5 years already and I don’t even know the name of the roads.Can’t bother to remember the names.
So I just sort of memorize the routes as in destinations and how to go there. Heheh..
dude,
i am so impressed.. seriously. i have forgotten how funny our street names are sometimes. but hey, sounds like you’re doing well. and my brother and i spent about 15 minutes laughing at your posts. keep it up, this will be my blog to check every morning when get up.. joanne
i meant blog to check every morning when I get up.. 🙂 heh
Oh my freaking goodness!!! Who remembers those names man!!!!
I think people merely travel the roads by heart. Like I do actually. =P Though Singapore street names are pretty much simpler, the amount of time you take to learn all of them is horrendous. A 10m road can even have a name by itself!!! So what I do is I recognise landmarks. *grins*
Like your Jalan Mana Laksa and Jalan Teh O Peng. =)
Hahaha… this is super funny!
Keep those funny post coming!!!
hahaha… luckily the roads in Brunei that named after famous people are short like Jalan Elizabeth III, Jalan Ong Sum Ping and so far no Datuk roads kekekeke…
Hahahahh! Gawd! This is badddd! Freaaaakin loooooong… *suprise*
Kenny, you’re such a big muthafucka!!
Taib Mahmud should have read your blog, probably he might replace the mother of all long rounabout names to “Jalan Kennysia Dua Dua Ki”.
LOL!!!!!!
I think when they grant someone datuk-sheep, it’s in the intro package that some road or other will be named after you.
holy cow! those are really the longest road and roundabout names i’ve ever seen, man!
at first i was like… 3 words only, what? and when it comes to the motherly roundabout… lmao
i wonder if those council people remember all the road names…
and what’s the point of changing road names :/ it will still be the same road, prolly less traveled now coz people would be sooo turned off by its name XD
Muahahahhaha!!!! That’s why I never go to remember the road name. I would say “Just give me which famous building nearby you”. Kihkihkih…
So kewl man, just love visiting your site bro, kewl effort, thinking of us all
Lol!!! You’ve hit the nail on the head. I never bother with road names back home, and Jalan Keretapi will always be Jalan Keretapi to me. But I agree that giving directions is a pain in the ass. I got lost in Kuching city south before because of the crazy road names (and all were named after someone too).
Anyways, Kuching has some pretty interesing road names. There’s a whole series of Jalan Kaloi, Tilapia and Barracuda or something like that along Damai.
His Majesty Sultan Haji Hassanal Bolkiah Mu’Izzaddin Waddaulah Ibni Al-Marhum Sultan Haji Omar ‘Ali Saifuddien Sa’Adul Khairi Waddien, Sultan and The Yang Di-Pertuan Negara Brunei Darussalam
This is the Sultan of Brunei’s name. 😛 Imagine a roundabout with that name.
Hrm, i’m pretty sure that most of the roads here in m’sia are named after famous ppl, like in KL its all named after someone. But then talk about LONG names…i’ve never seen road names that long ever!!! And malaysia receives yet another bragging rights…WOOT!!!
I was home(Kuching) for holiday, before I went out to the town, I pulled out a map, pen and paper, wrote down all names of those roads…. and while driving, kept looking at my notes, …
i had to stop myself from laughing out loud in the office!! WAKAKAKAK damn funny! the funny part is… you actually took all the pictures of all those street names!! man i dread going home. why cant they have street names like here. ahahahha….
Hey dude, who remember’s all teh street name? My mom’s direction to our house: ” Behind 兩毛錢”. ( yes that big tacky house)
LOLz… Yeah, I agree… Blardy long names they are… Sometimes people give me directions to places like that then i’ll be like, ermm… and people will end up saying, “How can you don’t know?? Kuching ciak tua still don’t know… Aiyooo….”
It’s more than the length of the street name. The Egyptian has the pyramid, the French has the naked stature, Stanford had The Stanford University, one of the best in the world and the Kuchinese has the fanciest street name.
Take your pick! All these supposedly-people-representatives want be remembered well the legacy they leave behind, and I happen to believe it’s a good thing if that is what motivates them to do good for the people. Slapping together a road sign with enough letters to wrap around a round-around is not exactly building a pyramid. Something we obviously can afford and very good at. It’s just an inconvenience for out of town tourists but they shouldn’t be here in the first place in my book. Actually the road signs kind of serve that purpose well, thanks to our datuk and datin. For the locals, tell me if anyone actually following those road signs going to the state library?
Whether these big shots deserve a 2-foot versus 5-foot road sign is another story entirely. I would say those reverse-Robin Hoods should have at least a 6-foot sign that said “I built this millions dollars mansion while I have my hands in the cookie jar†in their front yards.
ha….4got that the road names in kch are ridiculously long…and don get me started with roundabouts. i think i gave up remember roundabouts which names are too long years ago….n just referred them to ‘that roundabout at bla bla bla.’ and so on.
so far here in brissie…the longest road name that i have encountered is Sir Fred Schonell Drive….sighz why cant kch road names b this simple :p
this is a side-track here… though, anyone noticed the resemblance btw kenny and singapore’s adrian pang??
The should rename a street in my honour. how cool would Jalan Project 8555 sound?
heheheheh
*revs engine*
if you marry xiaxue and come & live in SG, you will not have such problems again
Muahahaha…the last pic champion leh..Kenny, can understand why u suffering from this illness.i oso suffer from 1. it’s called ITidiotitis….LOL
Kenny, this is creepy. I blogged about two of the road names before… (check your mail)
abdul is é¸éƒ½ï¼Ÿï¼Ÿ
i like how u connect road names with food. hahaha my favorite is jalan mana laksa!! ur brain works in weird ways indeed…
Mystery: What the hell is Cheng Ho doing in Sarawak?!
Kenny…You’re da man! I laughed non-stop reading your post.
Boy am I glad PJ uses numbers – the longest road name I’ve come across in my short life is Jalan P.P. Narayanan (aka Jalan 225).
I was laughing my head off reading all those road signs…
Names of Road and roundabouts , also can play, play..
damn cool and good…. non-stop ROFL….
I wonder what’s next.
speechless really.. the bulatans’ names r ridiculous!!
n i like that conversation at the end of the post.. so funny!! haha!!
next time don’t be surprise if a bulatan’s name become as long as it goes round the bulatan. 🙂
roundabouts have names?..gee..i nvr knew..
WAH!! confusing!! Anyway, I am finally leaving a message here. Nice funny blog. Good to see a fellow Malaysian having a great blog that can rival those of Singaporeans. 🙂
Hehehe – a good reason why I didn’t drive while I was in Kuching… *sweats*
hehehe.. i’ve seen this before in kuala lumpuer
Jalan Maharajalela ( old name – Jalan Birch)
it’s unfair. not only dato maharajalela took birch’s live, even his road….. hahahah
i wonder if we have Jalan Tok Janggut ( old name Jalan Sarjan che wan)……
… what’s next? datuk bahaman? rentap?
Fuck i never knew such a dumbass long name for a roundabout existed. Ridiculous. But you made it funny so in a way, i will actually look at it with a bit more credibility now – provided some laughter.
Insanity, that is!
hahaaaaaa lol
kenny sia, i just love reading abt the things you blog about. rock on, dude!
lol~
Kenny, this entry is freaking hilarious… You sure are an entertaining one!!
…………..i used to think my neighbourhood was so tacky as to name their roads with colors like Jalan Biru ,Hijau, Kuning etc etc….
now you just made me feel very very grateful…
Impractical lengthy names of places. Is it a Malaysian thing ?
Probably.
omg! luckily singapore doesn’t have such long road names. else, i’ll be at a loss of directions.
I remember the directions well…but not the road names. I know all the shortcuts around town, but I would hv no clue what roads they are. eheh.
malaysia boleh!!
Unberfukkinglievable.
at least the names are different..
come over my place and u’ll get jalan woods , lebuh woods , persiaran woods , etc etc etc..
drive into the next block and then u’ll get jalan papan , lebuh papan and persiaran papan..
we probably ran out of names..again..not like my place is huge..so *shrugs*..
and i bet that guy with the long-ass name was called abang haji..or even only haji all this while..
Eh I seriously don’t know how to reply to 72 comments lah. :/ You people are too kind. You’re not ignored of course! I do read all the comments, so thanks for bringing me sunshine. 🙂
And obviously I was making fun of the angmoh tourists asking for directions. Its true that to us Kuching people, these long road names are as good as nothing. Like many Kuchingnites have commented, we give directions based on landmarks that’s all (eg. Behind this shopping centre. etc)
NSDS3, thanks for the link. Petrajaya is notorious for that eh?
curious george, stop being so hard on yourself leh.
dawnie, are you still hoping that I’d marry xiaxue? Oh my.
synical, SPEAKING OF ROAD NAMES IN PETALING JAYA! Mannn all these SS 15/2 or something. The last time I was in PJ, I thought I was at the library or something. I know its numbers as road names means that its easier to navigate. But ughhh. Numbers?!
Hah! Born and bred in Kuching but never noticed the bulatan’s names. Probably was a good thing too. Funny post, man. See you at the PPS bash.
dis is hillarious! muahuahuauaahuahua.. funny.. ;p
Quite so. Although I would say that your direction to the library is wrong 😉
Speaking of which, there’s no Jalan Coconut BUT there is a Jalan Nyiur! It’s between the Central Barat-Timur traffic light and the temple, near the shops.
you from chung hua no 4? you are!
Yeah all those goddamn long names annoy me.
Dahlah I have no sense of direction, and I consistently fail sejarah.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA omg..
Classic!
just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >just realised how dumb some of those ppl are for giving the roads such long names o_O
“Angmoh tourist: “Excuse me, how do I get to the library?”
Local Sarawakian: “Oh that’s easy! From here, go along Jalan Datuk Abang Abdul Rahim, turn right at Jalan Tun Abdul Rahman and drive until you reach Bulatan Datuk Temenggong Abang Kipali Bin Abang Akip. Do a 3 o’clock towards Jalan TunKU Abdul Rahman, make a left at Jalan Tun Ahmad Zaidi Adruce and drive until you reach the roundabout at Bulatan Datuk Amar Abang Haji Suleiman Bin Haji Taha. Exit at Jalan Tun Abang Haji Openg, then turn left at Jalan Laksamana Cheng Ho. Soon you’ll reach Bulatan Datuk Menteri Abang Haji Mohammad Zin Bin Haji Salleh, where you should turn into Jalan Tun Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Muhammad Salahuddin until you arrive Bulatan Datuk Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah Bin Datuk Bandar Abang Haji Mohammad Kassim.”
lol a kchgian like me can’t even remember all that >
I know – I don’t use road signs in PJ, I’m more of a landmark person; which doesn’t work too well driving in downtown KL (I’ve found myself lost on numerous occasions with the unreliable road signs and the one way traffic down there >P)
What other alternatives are there to numbers and bloody long names? Pictures of animals or fruit like in some parking lots, haha.
last time i read the guiness record book, malaysia got the most longest company name in shortform (e.g. GE-Great Eastearn), the record holder have his company in shortform consisting 20+ characters?!
LOL! That’s hilarious! You’re the man! Keep up the good work, dude! Maybe, we should call the roundabout, a “Wonderabout”! I believe a lot of newbies will lost and start wondering there in the circle. I just hate roundabout when u know there’s a better solution called “Traffic Light”. Some roundabout are rediculously huge. I don’t mind given that land to build my house with a football field + many extras in there. ;P
Malaysia Boleh!
confusing confusing….how r the goit to write the add on an envelope..they either have towite it real small or get a bigger envelope..
Kenny… using numbers as road names is very common. Especially in N.Y. (5th Ave? 34th St?) and D.C and San Francisco…. in fact, D.C. uses letters of the alphabet to name their roads (J St, K St) It makes life for people with no sense of direction alot easier, especially if they are all parallel to each other 🙂
So eventhough the SS##/# and USJ## don’t make sense geographically, it’s easier to remember than royalty names that most people can’t even pronounce.
Ooh, I sound like a grandma nagging. My bad 😛
hie first time here.
It sure was hilarious..the names.. Some sounded familiar, somewhere deep down in my history textbooks but are oh, so long that i even had problems remember them then. HAHAHA.
Hmm with such long names wouldn’t ir be hazardous for drivers to drive & at the same time read/differentiate the loooong names?
Hi, first time to your site and this post had me laughing and laughing. 🙂
You people give names to roundabouts?
at least they’re kind enuff to give such a blardy long name to a roundabout coz nobody remembers them anyway…. 😀
GOOD JOB!
i wonder if the government will read this… 😉
hahahz…i’m a kuchingian too…studied in ur sch before too…and it’s cool too notice such cool things about kuching…two thumbs up dude…
hey thumbs up to u kenny! that was wayyyyy funny. i never realised that until i stumbled across your webpage hahaha i’ve been there a few times and maybe one day i’ll take pics next to one of those roundabout signs ;P
hey thumbs up to u kenny! that was wayyyyy funny. i never realised that until i stumbled across your webpage hahaha i’ve been there a few times and maybe one day i’ll take pics next to one of those roundabout signs ;P
Haha, it’s so funny, I got this in an email and I had to look for the orginal post. I think at those roundabouts in Kuching I’ll have to make 3 circles b4 I can fully read the names. Even at PJ roundabouts sometimes I have to go round it twice.:P
thanks a lot, kenny! maybe we can make tourist attractions of kuching quirks – and there are many.
boo!
this is funny… very very funny! Love this man!
hmm y u so free? for my 10 years digital photo editing experience, all is fake edited photos.
hmm y u so free? for my 10 years digital photo editing experience, all are fake edited photos.
To Kenzo,
in Kenny’s defense, not all the pictures are edited. The long names of the roads are real, especially the “mother of all long roundabout names”-I work near that area so I see it everyday.
Well a little bit of “bo liao” adds spice to our life, don’t you think? Not that Kenny is bo liao la.
miracle8: Wah…you work near that area?! Do you explain to people how they can get to your workplace?
I feel sorry for Kenzo somehow…After 10 years of experience!! Man…
Desperate addict,
No I don’t explain to people how to get there. Its not a tourist area. Its easier to remember the names of the buildings because thats what you will see on the road signs leading to the place anyway.
Damn it !!! What the hell is wrong with all this long names? Are you trying to make Malaysian people proud and hopefully we can remember them for as long as we can? What about those angmoh tourists? They will DIE of remembering this names before arriving their next destination. It will probably take them ages just to go to one place or another.
Like this, when it’s time for departure back to their homeland, they are still searching for the place. Hell man, change the names…
Aiyo… plausible larh hahahahhaa
Actually, these names were suggested by the History Assocation, Sarawak Branch. I think they’re gonna ‘datuknametoolongitise’ all the road names, according to them, to ‘remember’ the jasa of those peeps… well… ain’t know if anyone wud remember any of such…
Kenny,
The roundabout is the one near Dewan Undangan ah? Why I never see before one? Anyways, what’s new back home? Have been hearing lots of things here in KL, pls update me (by email pls).
Quote: “Humans remember names better than numbers.” Kuching gov thinks that it’s better to have long names than numbers, so there you go.
In KL, it’s all numbers. From SS1/1 to SS100/100. May as well give IP addresses to roads like 192.168.1.38!
How about voting Kenny for the next election? 😀
home equity line of credit http://www.home-equity-line-ofcredit.com
haha…i don’t bother with the names…didnt even notice that it’s no longer jln keretapi….wtheck not?! rubbish la….the roundabout names? absolutely insane, and i must clarify, ONLY in dbku area…lol…
i remember landmarks. ‘neh…grand continental hotel..then next door got used-to-be-fabulous-laksa-now-sucks-like-crap kinda thing. 😀
whaahahahahaa!!! rolling down the floor with this entry!!!!
Hi Kenny,
I’d like to address a couple of matters. Not so much matters as statements and questions, really.
Firstly GOOD ON YOU for making this blog the way it is, I can’t remember the last time I had to laugh so hard, as well as for having the “Malaysian”ness of your blog.
and a coupple of questions:
1. May I link your blog?
2. Are there protocols in the blogosphere to follow, i.e: if/when someone wants to link his/her blog to another blog or webpage, is formal permission required, or is it simply the common courtesy of asking?
cheers Kenny!
Re – your reply: thanks!
cool was on Star papers on Sunday
proud to be sarawakian….
don’t you ever come back… will be waiting
some excerpts from Sarawak Talk
“Kenny Sia is bloody Idiot, he thought he is so smart.
Wait lah, wait and see, we know how you looks like so dont let us see you ANYWHERE. You better prepare Kenny Sia”
“Kenny Sia is still a baby!!!!
He obviously still has a pacifier in his mouth, day n nite. Well, he wrote the stupidest article I have ever read in my entire life, “Jalan Datuk What What What?” published on August 6, 2005 in The Star. Who ask you to remember the road names? If you think they are TOO TOO long, return to Kuching. Stay in ur EVERYTHING-IS-GOOD-IN-PERTH cozy home for the rest of ur damn life. You are not praising Kuching road names, in fact, you are humiliating our City. Get back to ur Mama’s arms, and have a pacifier stuck in ur mouth FOREVER!!!
I know your UGLY face!!! Watch out when walking at nite!!! Better be home by 8pm coz Mama is waiting ……
Hey boys n gals, check out his website http://www.kennysia.com & u know what Im talking about. His website shows it all!!!! ”
THIS GUY IS JUST TOO FUNNY….HAHAHA
Ridiculous, how the authorities are so into the names of these famous people and actually name the WHOLE name in these road signs..
Wow, didn’t know such road names exist!
I received a link to this particular blog entry from a foreign consulate to Malaysia a couple of weeks back. Just absolutely love it! Linking it up on my blog site. 🙂
I am not against roads and roundabouts or buildings being named after anyone, but long names are hard to read and harder to remember. Names like “Palm”, ‘Rubber” or “Green” is excellent for naming road. Since Kuching is a Garden City or trying to be, then perhaps the roads should be named after flowers and birds.
Sarawak has an interesting mixed up history which the “kids” today doesnt know. N too bad Tampin isnt a nice name after all, no offence but im just saying it honestly.
“Abang” is not a title which is from Bruneian and Melanau blue blooded men.LOL~
F.Y.I. “Abang” comes from the Javanese Royalty name.
So, please change who ever blog and don’t humiliate us, the locals, by putting that wrong information about “Abang” title.
N lastly, the cab drivers in Kuching, theyre surely know where to go because theyre sarawakians. LOL~ n please don’t compare Sarawak to Singapore or any other places, theyre obviously different!N each has its unique elements.
Kind Regards.
The association of the name with the food part was really funny.
was feelin kinda moody before but that cheered me up a notch. Thanks Kenny!!!
Datuk Maharajalela – Freedom fighter or slave trader?
The Golden Chersonese
http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/etext02/gctwt10.txt
The slaves of the reigning princes were
very easily acquired, for a prince had only to send a messenger bearing
a sword or kris to a house, and the parents were obliged to give up any
one of their children without delay or question. In debt slavery, which
prevails more or less among all classes, and has done a great deal to
degrade the women of the Peninsula, a man owing a trifling debt
incurred through extravagance, misfortune or gambling, can be seized by
his creditor; when he, his wife, and children, including those who may
afterwards be born, and probably their descendants, become slaves.
Pejuang kemerdekaan dan bangsa, atau penjual hamba?
Idiotic local authorities who have way too many datuks and desire to have their name somewhere…anywhere …. next thing you know,they would name the public toilets after datuks …. like the toilet behind Electra House … Tandas Awam Datuk Patinggi Tun Taib… crap and more crap indeed… sigh !!
Walao, juz found out that quite some of the road names in Kuching are the same as those in my town –Sibu. Pretty confusing, eh?
hey, dat’s my ancestors name! watchout ya’ll, dun mess wit us!
OMG, and that is my line of history’s names. I blink-blink my eyes just readin em. Hahahaha..
Kenny! ur so funny!!! i love you!
haha…..why ahh??…thank god KL is easier.
hehe.
yea man, none of that shit here in oz
I’m stay at kuching 35yrs, but i dint realise that our roundabout got name. really funny. laugh until mau mati liao……hahahahaha
yeah…that’s why I nvr bother to remember road name either…usually I’ll ask for building or landmark. The name too long sometimes i can’t recall…
kamek suka your blog * lol *
Best of the best entries exclusively by Kenny Sia
JALAN TUN DATUK PATINGGI ABANG HAJI MUHAMMAD SALAHUDDIN
can it be…
JALAN UN TUK ATI BANG A-HAM?
4 years late; I almost wanted to ‘chastise’ you for making fun of these Datuks who *must* have done great contributions to earn their names on these streets… but the last roundabout name got to me. THEN you topped it off with that very convincing sample of a road direction *I’d hand over RM 50 ANYTIME for a guy who could do that without rehearsing*!
LMAO!
Kenny, you totally fail at failing to get your point across!
those name are crazy!!
Thanks for taking the time to discuss this, I feel strongly about it and love learning more on this topic. If possible, as you gain expertise, would you mind updating your blog with more information? It is extremely helpful for me.
^ Sounds like ‘professional’ Spam~
Jalan Mana Laksa? There was a road in the brickfield area in KL … known as Jalan Laksamana…..
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