Sunday, 26th June.
2:00pm. Hotel 81 Chinatown.
When I parted with Scarlett Ting the night before, I promised I’d do lunch with Sassy Janice and her today. Its already 2pm and she still hadn’t yet replied my SMS. Wait any longer and our lunch date is gonna turn into dinner.
I messaged ‘Very Poisonous Lady’ Apple Lim since I was supposed to meet her for coffee as well, but there was no reply either. Man, I never felt so neglected.
Still feeling giddy as I recounted the events of last night I ventured out of my hotel alone, wandering around aimlessly and ended up at Plaza Singapura.
3:45pm. Plaza Singapura.
I like heart-shaped latte art.
Phone call from Ting, finally. Believe it or not, that woman had only just woke up. You know you’re a blog addict when you went home at 6am after meeting so many people from the blogosphere and the first thing you did was to update your blog.
By coincidence, paikia(bad boy)-loving Finicky Feline was in Plaza Singapura as well. We arranged to meet at Cafe Cartel, and she bought me a drink. Thanks, FF!
Her old-time friend GuoJun joined us a little later. He paid for his own drink. Poor bastard.
In case you were wondering. That’s not FF’s real face.
Something unusual happened while we were sitting there chilling out. A man approached us and placed a little pin attached to a card on our table. The card reads something like this: “I am deaf. I would appreciate it if you help me out by purchasing this badge, which costs SGD$5”. I’ve seen people doing this in Kuching as well.
I had my suspicions because the man is obviously well-dressed and well-fed, probably more well-fed than I am. If it were to choose between giving him or the Kuching Shuffler money, I’d choose the latter without blinking twice. FF reckoned it was a con, but my lousy conscience got the better of me.
When the man returned, I handed him SGD$2 and asked him to keep the pin. FF looked at me quizically. I looked back at her grinning sheepishly. Was I conned?
We looked over our shoulders when we heard funky music blaring over the speakers. Apparently there’s some cheerleading demonstration going on. FF, GJ and I ran over there like primary school children at the start of their lunch break.
Download cheerleading video: here or here.
I always thought male cheerleaders are kinda gay. Despite that fact, you gotta envy them because they can anyhow grab, fondle and touch those hot nubile little cheerleaders without landing themselves into hot water. So lucky. When I grow up I wanna be a cheerleader too.
5:00pm. Plaza Singapura.
FF and GJ left to watch some crappy movie. Scarlett Ting sent me a message blasting me for making her meet so many strangers. And Apple Lim just woke up.
“OH MY GOD! I slept like a pig!! Seventeen hours!“
Seventeen hours! Have you heard anyone who have slept for 17 hours?! Gee, what is it with Singaporeans and punctuality? 😉 And I thought Xiaxue was being mean for making me so long for the answers to her IQ questions.
6:15pm. Bakerzin (or was it Baker’s Inn?)
Scarlett Ting, Sassyjan and I finally had “lunch” at 6:15pm.
Joining us was “Chao Ah Lian” Apple Lim.
Apple’s round necklace and ring intrigued me. She said she likes round things. I think that’s probably the reason why she likes me.
Apple Lim is truly one of a kind. I’m not saying that because she once declared that she wanted to hug my hairy leg to sleep. I’m saying that because I’ve never seen a self-confessed Ah Lian blogger as good and as hilarious as she is. She’s also in the Wheels Magazine Race Queen contest, so go vote for her.
There’s this stereotypical misconception that models are usually stuck-up bimbotic airheads. Apple is the exact opposite.
Me giving you that grin that makes you wanna throw a punch to my face.
We talked only once on MSN. When I told her I was coming to Singapore, she was nice enough to offer her place (not her room lah, siao) for me to stay. I declined, fearing she’d secretly take photos of me in my red boxers and post it all over the Internet. She suggested Hotel 81 Chinatown, which is why I stayed there this time round.
Interesting fact: all the girls in this table are or were at some point involved with modelling / talent agencies.
I felt so left out. The only modelling experience I had was when I did my SarongPartyGirl pose.
Anyway, I’m surprised Apple Lim is so unpretentious, so incredibly down-to-earth, so likeable. It was the first time she met us all, but we seem to hit off pretty well. Scarlett Ting and Apple had a lot more in common than they think, and they were chatty throughout lunch dinner. Apple told us her interesting encounter with a fortune teller. I was amused she put so much faith in what a fortune teller told her.
I had agreed to meet James Seng and mr brown for dinner at 8pm, so I bade the girls farewell.
8:30pm. River Valley.
Finally. Some male bonding after all that female attention. Never thought I was ever gonna say this, but after a while, I kinda grew tired being surrounded by hot and pretty girls, especially when these girls belong to the can-see-but-cannot-touch category.
I had a long chit-chat with mr brown that night, and it was definitely the most enlightening moment throughout my whole trip in Singapore. No wonder they called him the ah kong (granddaddy) of Singaporean blogosphere. This man knows his shit. Right down to its colour, texture, and the number of undigested yellow kernels in it.
Pyramids of chicken rice. Beware of boobie traps.
We talked about the Singaporean blog culture, the upcoming Blogger’s convention, the commercial aspect of blogging, among other things. One thing I realised from our conversation is how much more mature and serious the blog culture is in Singapore compared to the rest of Asia. Its evident from the facts. Mr brown, Miyagi are writing for Today; Wendy is writing for The New Paper, Maxim, endorsing LocalBrand; and most interestingly, commercial entities are APPROACHING the Bloggercon organizers for sponsorship, instead of the other way round.
All these are happening while Malaysian bloggers are still gloating over how they got their first cheques from Google Adsense.
James “Drupal” Seng, mrbrown, some Malaysian dude, and remote control specialist HC
I learnt so much from mr brown that night, and yet he still chia me eat chicken rice. What a nice man. Thanks mb, I appreciate it.
12:30am. Holland Village.
Decided to meet up with the princess again before I leave the country the following day.
I was buying FHM and Maxim (as I always do when I’m in Singapore) at Cold Storage when a makeup-less Wendy in pink platforms suddenly appeared and gave me the shock of my life that froze me. How appropriate was it then that I was in Cold Storage.
We adjourned to the nearest kopitiam, where she wowed and entertained me with her amazing blowing skills.
BUBBLE blowing skills lah. What were you thinking?
Quite a few people have asked me how Xiaxue is like in real life. I admire her for her willingness to share details of her private and personal life. I think in a way, she is very similar to the way she blogs – feisty, straightforward, sometimes mean, sometimes vindicative. But not mean to the point where she’ll kick a stray dog off the road lah of course.
Kenny: “Eh why you cross the road like that? Not scared cars knock you down one is it?”
Wendy: “Never mind lah. Cars won’t knock down ‘mei nu’ one.”
Kenny: “…”
Still, it takes a lot of understanding to click with Wendy’s sense of humour and not get offended.
People are so used to her being that snobbish vengeful bitch online its kinda difficult accepting her nice, angelic side. And she does have an angelic side. Its the subtle things she did that speak for itself. Like how she blew bubbles to make a little toddler girl smile, and later gave the whole tube for her to play with.
Somehow this picture looks very wrong. Its not what you think alright?
People usually don’t notice things like these when she writes about it online, but it does bring a nice fuzzy feeling to my stomach.
Wendy and I chatted, joked, strolled till 5am in the morning.
In the process, we encountered one big ass spider.
Wendy tried to act chio by planting a flower on her head.
I tried to act chio, but failed.
Miserably.
5:15am. Hotel 81.
I returned to my hotel after exchanging goodbyes with Wendy.
I was about to enter the lobby, when out of a sudden I spotted two familiar faces scurrying towards the exit. It all happened within a few seconds, but I managed to whip out my digital camera in time to snap this scandalous picture.
mr brown and James Seng. Seen walking out of Hotel 81… TOGETHER!
Now we know exactly what the Tomorrow.sg editors meant when they say “We work together hard. Very hard.“
Thanks to those who e-mailed me information on “Jenne”. I decided to just let it go.
This is the last of my entries documenting events of my KL/Singapore trip. Back to more normal-length posts from now.
Xiaxue really that bad in real life meh? I guess some people are just like that… but it’s hard to imagine that people like that can be liked by many.
n305er: Hello, he wrote about me in a good way okie!!
So anyway, I don’t want people to thinK I am some kind-hearted, virtueous young lady. I AM NOT! I am every bit the mean, horrible monster I am on my blog!
I erm, actually gave the toddler girl the bubbles coz it was sticky and I don’t want it to dirty my bag.
NAH! Just kidding! I am kind and benevolent! Hor, Kenny? (Say yes or I’ll go to Kuching to strangle you)
Damn, its 6am, and I smell roti prata.
And I love the title, Hubby! So brilliant ah you!
Kenny, 26th June or July ???
hey! wah! seems u had a nice time in KL/Singapore leh… good fer ya!
Bubbles are supposed to be soap-y… Why was it sticky? Hmm…
I love the last picture. Scandalous!
“All these are happening while Malaysian bloggers are still gloating over how they got their first cheques from Google Adsense.”
I agree with you there, Kenny
ps: I love Xiaxue too!!! 😀
The pleasure was mine, K. How often does one get to take out a femes Singaporean blogger from Kuching for dinner?
James and I wanted to check out the clean linens that Hotel 81 is so femes for. Really.
🙂
Wah piang eh. You and Xiaxue really good together loh.
*runs*
I erm, actually gave the toddler girl the bubbles coz it was sticky and I don’t want it to dirty my bag.
ermm….Sticky….it does makes one wonder where the tube had been…..given it’s form and that pack of tissue……..and seeing the fact that there are bubbles inside the tube which should not be the case unless shaken…….hmm……..kinky!!!
Make sure you meet up with Cheeky and Bubblemunche the next time you drop by Singapore. I really want to see a threesome between the 3 funniest bloggers……
heehee! did ya c that clip? poor cheerleader…opps! dropped! sigh..
xialanxue, in case you’re wondering: –
1. my gf requested that I not write anything about her on my blog.
2. she reads me.
3. i was merely documenting my experiences in Singapore.
There’s nothing to speculate about, really.
Hmm…I really envy you. Seems like being a blogger do pay more than just money (read: Xiaxue)
I bet you would never imagine that a guy like you would ever be the centre of attention of so many fk-able babe. Did you have wild sex with any of them? Did xx show you her prowess in blowing? How many condoms did you eventually had to use? Or you din use any?
me slept 18 hours before! *haha*
nice! *yum!*
Wah reminds me of Singapore 🙁 Hey,anything happening back home in Kuching? Now that ST is no longer online cant get Kuching/Sarawak news leh….can update me via email? Thanks.
LOL.. that last pic is a gem.. you can use it to threaten grandfather brown.. Btw, that chicken rice pic looks yummy.. I’m a singaporean but i dont know where that place is.. haha
C’mon, Kenny—get with a winner: QuickTime. WMP is so last century.
Anyway, I didn’t hear any cheering.
I know where…in singapore….only Boon Tiong Ji….or Wen Tong Ji sells Pyramid shaped rice mounds with white Chicken. from the place he was, looks like river valley branch…..
Is it Boon Tong Kee? I don’t think so. If I’m not wrong, it’s a different group of people selling it. Anyway, I really like the last picture! Goodness, we’ve Mr. Brown and Mr. Seng walking out of Hotel 81 at that kinda timing. Bad Brown and Bad Seng!!!
Is it Boon Tong Kee? I don’t think so. If I’m not wrong, it’s a different group of people selling it. Anyway, I really like the last picture! Goodness, we’ve Mr. Brown and Mr. Seng walking out of Hotel 81 at that kinda timing. Bad Brown and Bad Seng!!!
Kenny, Kenny, Kenny….
I’m all jealous.
First, you flirted oh so publicly and repeatedly with XX. Then, you arrived in SG and conveniently forgot to *ah-hem* inform your most loyal groupie (me), and now, you’ve even put in a kind word to syntaxfree even though I’m going thru the same agony waiting for my ultrasound results.
I’m so utterly crashed….
Miserably,
Linda
Scandalous, that last picture!
By the way Kenny, the bandwith for cheerleader videos have ran out. Uh, don’t look at me like that…
kenny, i don’t like you very much now. we have different ways of making money. if blogging about nonsense gains me endorsements, i wouldn’t feel very proud about it.
Are Malaysian Bloggers Inferior to Singaporean Bloggers?
Apparently, Malaysian bloggers who only have bad press media and gloat about mediocre USD100 Adsense earnings are inferior to Singaporean bloggers who get to write for real publications, get offered endorsements and get paid for it!
Its evident from …
the last picture had me choking on my cream crackers……
Aren’t Hotel 81 rooms rented out by the hour?
i guess some things in life are not meant to be compared. i believe comparing bloggers from differing countries is one of them. same goes for the return on investment(roi)from blogging too. and i think ‘gloating’ is not the right word lah Kenny. maybe ‘appreciating’? coz not everyone blogs for cash.
I kept laughing throughout the post…
…because I kept remembering minishorts’ post whenever I saw your face! 8-D
I kept laughing throughout the post…
…because I kept remembering minishorts’ post whenever I saw your face! 8-D
GuoJun and FF got fu qi xiang (couple look)!!
eh eh… you’re forgetting that some Malaysian bloggers actually write FULL TIME for newspapers here too… we may not endorse products, but at least we get free movie passes… hehe
Kenny: Man is definitely balls enlarging to have someone with such BIG balls visiting my blog! IT’s SURREAL! thanks man!
Notes to bloglitician: I AM SITE-Whoring 🙂
Kenny: Man is definitely balls enlarging to have someone with such BIG balls visiting my blog! IT’s SURREAL! thanks man!
Notes to bloglitician: I AM SITE-Whoring 🙂
Thanks for mentioning my name and linking my blog. My counter went like like er.. 10 counts.. Heehee, just joking.
But seriously, FF is so pretty in real life, dun always de-face her face with some weirdo’s face. Haha
kenny! -sings- you’re my inspiration. bn a closet kenny-sian. hur-hur. tot say.. helloooooo… kenny boleh! =)
ouch! mr brown… what on earth you doing at a godforsaken hour there?! sheesh…
omg! scandalous!
i like tt flower in ur hair kenny. haha
Nice pics dude, btw you definately can’t act as gay as me 😉
Were they walking out of Hotel 81 together?
Or… were they doing the deed right in front of it?
Their pelvises seem to be stuck together… so scandalous… *gasp in horror*
And u asked me out for lunch, my dear. ‘you promised’ sounded like i desperately pleaded you for one and u promised. -sneer-
wahaha! the last pic best!!! 🙂
wahaha! the last pic best!!! 🙂
wahaha! the last pic best!!! 🙂
marry her already!
Curtis G, heh. It was actually converted to WMV from MOV files. Most ppl seem to be able to play WMV files.
mystic, where do I start?
Linda Chia, so sorry to hear about your experiences. 🙁 Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?
NSDS3, so tell me how many time you downloaded the videos?!
PaulTan, thank you ha… this all turn into big ruckus already. Heh heh heh.
hankyo, poor cream crackers.
Janet, Geylang isn’t the only branch where they operate you know.
Din, I’m sure most ppl don’t blog for cash exclusively. But when the opportunity arise, won’t you take it?
desperate addict, fu qi xiang?! FF is gonna kill you (and me) for that.
eyeris, different bah. There’s a lot of trained professional writers that blog (minishorts, niki cheong, jennemeade), but pardon my ignorance because I don’t know much about untrained writers that were approached and recruited purely because of their blogs. Other than HB. But he rejected.
kidchan, i’m still a normal guy leh. 😀
GJ, done!
Ting, !!! oh my. wrong choice of words again?
hellokitty, dun siao lah.
good point. of course if given opportunity.
Hmm FF pic got Ring effect, and the other girl Uzumaki… creepy.
😀
Well, what can I say? I read abt yr blog on URBAN juz this morning. Continued this evening… Your blog is quite funny. Will continue later in the night
Well, what can I say? I read abt yr blog on URBAN juz this morning. Continued this evening… Your blog is quite funny. Will continue later in the night
xiaxue is HOT
Harhar. u r so funny. yeah xiaxue looks great
wah kao !
u had such a happy time at the hotel !
wo pei fu ni !
vintage stocking photos short skirts stockings
The first stage of a £150m investment in regional museums is praised for boosting visitor numbers…
oh i havent heard of someone who sleeps for 17hrs. but i myself slept for 21hrs, and somemore on 2 occasions. oops.