Making a wax model of your own hand seems like the newest money-wasting fad in town.
Good to see. Nice to hold. Totally useless like an asshole.
I spotted one these Wax Hand Union kiosks in Tun Jugah Shopping Centre a few months back. Since then, a couple more of these kiosks mushroomed all over town, usually manned by bored-looking Ah Bengs napping in their seats.
As is the case with every other fad franchising business, these kiosks eventually lose money, close down, and slowly disappear one by one.
Out of curiousity, I got a wax model of my hand done a long long time ago. Naturally, I chose the most appropriate hand gesture that came to mind.
“WHAT? WANNA FIGHT AH? NAH!!! KANEBO CHAO CIBA VISION!”
That was around two months back. I kinda left the wax model in the cupboard and forgotten all about it. The recent spate of childish attack comments on my site suddenly reminded me that I had this ‘secret counter weapon’ hidden away.
Unfortunately when I dug it out of its box, I found this instead.
Oops.
Damn. There’s nothing more frustrating than a body part turning flaccid when you needed it most.
So anyway, I was at Tun Jugah yesterday shopping for some business shirts at G2000 when I impulsively decided to get another wax hand model done.
The girl at the counter quoted me the price of RM10 for a single hollow hand wax, an additional RM5 for a base, and another RM15 if I were to make it solid.
Exhibit A: A typical money-losing business.
I was tempted to pay RM30 to go for the full package considering my middle-finger wax model had collapsed earlier. But then I thought RM30 for crappy wad of wax isn’t worth it. She however, convinced me to go for a hollow model and if it were to collapse, she’ll do me a solid one for another RM15. I agreed.
Ice Ice Baby.
I opted to do a wax model of my half-clenched fist.
The girl first immersed my hand into a container of ice-cold water. This is to numb my hand sufficiently for the hot wax later, but I think she overdid it. The water was so cold I almost went into hypothermia.
Feelin’ Hot Hot Hot!
And here’s my hand dipped into hot wax. I always thought ‘dipping my hand into hot wax’ sounded kinda kinky. Not this time.
She dipped my hand into cold water and hot wax alternately for a couple of times until a layer of wax forms on the surface. Its a little painful to have my ice-cold hand immersed into hot wax immediately. My half-clenched fist contracted involuntarily which means the end result probably wouldn’t be what I wanted.
From this angle, it looked like I was tweaking her nipple but I swear its not like that.
Finally a thick layer of wax has formed tightly on my hand. The girl umm…. gave me a hand by peeling my shaped wax off. It felt bizarrely good. The sensation is like removing a tight sweaty hand glove on a hot day. I was lucky the hair on my hand didn’t go with it.
All that’s left to do is touch up on the model…
The HAND model, not the GIRL model!
Dip it into some coloured wax…
Choose between red, blue or yellow!
Attach it to the base…
Yes I chose a heart-shaped base. Don’t ask. They don’t have much choice.
TADA!
My very own wax hand model!
Brilliant, eh?
So, the next big question is then… what the foot am I gonna use this for?
Well my friends. Surprisingly, there are many ways an additional hand can come in err… handy.
For example, you can use it to act like you’re in shock.
Put in on your desk and show people how much bling-bling you’ve got.
And err… I leave it up to your imagination here. 😉
Anyone have any other suggestions?