Nicole + Thattimeofthemonth = My time spent in front of computer reduced. Drastically.
What? You think I want to update my blog 2:30am in the morning yesterday?
There’s a joke that goes something like this.
“So why do they call it PMS?”
“Well that’s because Mad Cow Disease is already taken.”
I remember back in high school, I asked my good friend Eric how he knew when his girlfriend is having her period.
“Its easy, Kenny” Eric replied spontaneously. “When she’s having her PMS… I stand up also kena. I sit down also kena. I hang around doing nothing scratching my legs like that… ALSO KENA!“
Why ar? Why do women have to abuse their boyfriends so harshly they’re having their period? I mean, its none of OUR business you’re having your period bah! Its not our fault you’re constructed that way. We can’t change that. You think we want you to bleed every month ar?
They ask you to ‘whisper’ so why are you shouting so loudly?
I’ve got female friends who complain how being a woman is so difficult. Women get harrassed, they get lower pay, they get pregnant.
And to top it all off, every month they get a visit from this horrible monster called ‘menstruation’ where they get cramps, they get bloated, they get cranky. So they get to yell at men, they get to throw things at men, they get to be totally unreasonable towards men, they get to force men to buy chocolates for them, then they get to cry for absolutely no reason at all and the men have to sit there and console them whilst uttering cuss words beneath their breath.
I’m not saying girls shouldn’t complain about their period. I know how painful having your period is. Errr.. wait, actually I don’t.
But since when its our fault you’re having your period. Why are we being made your scapegoat? How come we have to suffer together with you? If you’re painful or what just deal with it lah. Don’t complain and whine and cry here and there.
But of course… I’m not supposed to question you when you’re having your PMS. Sorry. Here, feel free to use my face as your punching bag.
I am wrong. You are right. You may hit me now.
Times like these I actually admire those gay couples out there. At least their partners don’t suffer from PMS. So they get to be all gay and happy.
But how about lesbian couples? Shit! Its gonna be bigger than World War 3 if both of them got hit by PMS exactly the same time. Imagine those dildos and strap-ons as missles!
*cough* Sorry I digressed. But my point is this.
Women always complain that having PMS is one of the worst things women have to endure. All I’m saying is – don’t bully your boyfriend lah. One person suffering is enough, why make two people suffer? Have you ever stop and wonder what your boyfriends have to go through every month when you have your period? Think about it!
We practically had to shrink our balls and lock them away while we listen to you picking a fight with us over the most itsy-bitsy-teeny-weenie things, only because we think its not worth jeopardizing the relationship over such trivial matters.
“Yes dear, you are right.”
“Yalah, its my fault. Sorry.”
“Ok lah don’t be angry liaw lah. Buy cadbury for you ok?”
These are just some of the lines we use to ‘let you win’. But the truth is – we only say it just to make you happy nia. Don’t actually mean it one.
See when you’re having your PMS, your job is easy. At the end of the day, you just eat your chocolates and blame it all on your hormones. But what about us? You’ve hurt our feelings. Our testicles have shrunk, and they will never grow back to the same size again. NEVER! 🙁
So girls, next time you have your PMS… will somebody PLEASE think of the children boyfriends!?
UPDATE: Lashing out against women, I am not. More like crying foul at the uhh… “injustices” myself and boyfriends around the world are facing.