kennysia.com

19 November 2008

Short Talk:

Pardon me if I don't update as often. It's only three weeks left till my marathon race. Yesterday, I woke up at 4am and jogged 25km for 4 hours under the rain. If I still don't lose weight, there'd better be a damn good explanation for me.

Crap, there's blood in my poop. I must be menstruating.

Things I Learnt In Zouk Singapore

So I was in Singapore two weekends ago for a business trip.

I must apologise to friends in Singapore for not meeting up when I was in town. I was holed up in my hotel room rushing for a deadline. By the time I finished it was already 1am.

My hotel was pretty close to Zouk, so when I was done staring at the computer screen for 6 hours straight, I thought it's only deserving that I walk over to the club and reward myself with a glass of ice cold beer.

It's been ages since I been to Zouk in Singapore, and I gotta say a lot has changed. Not necessarily in a good way, but definitely in an amusing way.

As soon as I stepped into Phuture, immediately I noticed something unusual - there were more batangs than lubangs.

The boys in the club heavily outnumbered the girls by some 4 to 1, so much so that I almost made a U-turn towards the exit thinking I've accidentally entered a gay club. I'm not homophobic, but let's face it, watching pairs of guys dancing with each other on the floor ain't a pretty sight.

The second thing I noticed is the dressing sense of the people in there. For better or worse, the Singaporeans are always ahead of us Malaysians when it comes to fashion.

Whatever's popular in Singapore becomes always popular in Kuching 5 years later. And there are some good ones we picked up. Case in point, short skirts and spaghetti straps from MNG.

There are some bad ones too. Like those Chao Ah Beng hairstyles back in the 90s.

When I was in Zouk that Saturday night, I was surprised to see a lot of guys there wearing hats.

No, not baseball caps. Those are still cool.

HATS. Like the ones your grandpa wore back in the 60s.

Not only that, a lot were also wearing thick black-rimmed glasses. Again, just like the ones your grandpa wore back in the 60s.

What's up with that?

I'm surprised they didn't bring along a walking stick to the club. It seems as if the new fashion is old-fashion. In fact, there were so many guys in the club going for "The Vintage Look", Phuture should be renamed Phistory.

I dunno man. I reckon in this day and age, the only time people should be allowed to wear hats and black-rimmed glasses to a club is if you have a cool name.

Like will.i.am.

If not, then maybe john.a.than or lim.ah.seng will do too.

The girls in the club , for the record, are HOT.

Not the best example, but... you get the idea

These girls they dress up hot, they make up hot, they breathe hot. And when they go to the club together, they dress up in their tiniest sluttiest clothing knowing that it'll get attention of all the guys in the clubs.

But these girls are in for a girls night out. They're not interested in meeting any guys whatsoever. When they go out clubbing, they just wanna dance among their own girly circles while the guys, wearing their Ah Gong vintage hat and black-rimmed glasses, can only salivate.

More often than not, this creates an interesting situation where two hot girls get on the dance floor doing their sexy dance moves with each other, while some EIGHT other guys surround them in a circle watching.

The guys are thinking that those girls wanna get picked up, so they moved in for the kill.

Problem is, these guys have NO CREATIVITY whatsoever when it comes to approaching girls. A lot of the times, they just sneakily dance up from behind the girl and, without even a hello or an eye-contact, somehow just put their hands on her waist.

Then as soon as the DJ plays one of those slut songs (eg. "Buttons", "Culo", "Low", anything by Britney Spears or Fergie), they HUMP AND GRIND from behind as hard as they can.

Bear in mind, these guys don't know the girls at all. Because as soon as they finished grinding them, I saw them turn around, shake the girl's hands and introduce themselves.

Hello?! A minute ago you were just dry-humping her ass! How can you immediately go from that to shaking hands!

It wasn't just a particular incidence because I saw it happening multiple times throughout the night. The girls must be used to it because a lot of them don't seem to mind, or care. Some of them did try to move away to another part of the dance floor, but all they'll encounter is another bunch of guys doing the same thing.

As for the guys, well, they were hi-fiving to their other guy friends afterwards, so I guess there must be some kinda contest going on. The more asses you dry-humped, the more of a man you are. Or something like that.

No wonder all the Singaporean bloggers I read are not going to clubs anymore.

All of them now prefers to stay at home and play mahjong instead!

:: Posted by Kenny at 6:25 PM | Link | Facebook It | Comments (89)
:: Categorised as 'Thoughts & Musings'

15 November 2008

Short Talk:

- JoyceTheFairy called me to tell you that U.O.X. Play by KLue, Junk and Tongue-in-Chic magazines is happening this Saturday at Capsquare KL so go check it out.
- Nicolekiss also asked me to tell you that she's got new stocks in her online boutique so go buy some of her stuff.
- Bill Gates told me to tell you that the new Windows Live Messenger beta is awesome so click here and go download it.

Nipples

Pinkpau was telling me about her Halloween costume and how she nearly had a "wardrobe malfunction" with it.

Pinkpau: haih stupid wan la i hate nipples

Pinkpau: why do we have to have them

Kenny: HOW CAN YOU HATE NIPPLES!

Pinkpau: cos they spoil my pictures >=(

Kenny: At least you girls have a use for them! How bout us guys? We can"t even use our nipples for anything!

Kenny: Except letting our girlfriends poke them.

Pinkpau: or nipple cripple

Kenny: Or play with it like an iPod.

Seriously, why do men need nipples anyway?!

:: Posted by Kenny at 7:14 AM | Link | Facebook It | Comments (113)
:: Categorised as 'The Blog Culture'

12 November 2008

Short Talk:

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Head to their website, or drop by their roadshow in Cineleisure Damansara this weekend and pick up some free goodie bags while you're there!

ADV: Kenny Learns to Cook

KY, Cheesie and I attended the GUINNESS® Gastronomic Workshop hosted by celebrity chef Emmanuel Stroobant.

I must admit that I am completely hopeless when it comes to cooking.

I have been told many times that women find men who knows how to cook sexy and attractive. Case in point, during this year's CLEO 50 Most Eligible Bachelor competition, Bachelor #3 Ebi Kornelis whooped 49 other bachelors' collective asses to top the online polls.

All because he knows how to make ikan bakar!

It's not that I do not know how to cook. I used to cook myself instant noodles all the time. But I dunno why people keep saying that cooking instant noodles is not considered "real" cooking.

What lah, cooking for "real" or "fake one meh?

My mom was not impressed when I told her that I don't wanna learn how to cook.

She insisted that I was being lazy. Instead of learning how to cook, I gave her stupid excuses like how cooking is so damn difficult and how I could accidentally burn the house down if I wasn't careful.

"COOKING IS EASY!" she said. I went on and on about how it's even EASIER to pay someone RM10 to do the same thing, but all that resulted was her rolling her eyes and offering to show me the kitchen.

Too bad. Instead of taking up her offer, I went straight to a CELEBRITY CHEF!

This is the AFC's Chef In Black Emmanuel Stroobant, a man blessed with a body that resembled more like a male fashion model than the master chef of an exclusive fine-dining restaurant in Singapore.

Watching Emmanuel Stroobant demonstrate his cooking skills, I began to doubt my mom's assertion that "COOKING IS EASY!"

Watching Emmanuel did his thing, I thought he looked more like he was building IRONMAN than heating up some tuna.

There were flame throwers, test tubes, precision digital scales among other gadgets more likely to be found in James Bond's arsenal than my mom's kitchen.

Chef in Black making GUINNESS® flavoured sorbet

Emmanuel was very fast. His main target audience are the senior chefs from the big name restaurants in Klang Valley, who attended the workshop to learn how to creatively incorporate GUINNESS® into their cooking. As a beginner with very little experience in the kitchen, I only managed to absorb a small portion of what he had shown us.

The infusion of GUINNESS® in food isn't exactly something new.

The bold, distinctive and signature bittersweet taste of the legendary black beer complements extremely well with either sweet or salty dishes. Although not widely explored before, using GUINNESS® in cooking is quickly gaining popularity. In fact, one of the most popular dishes in Kuching's seafood restaurants are GUINNESS® chicken wings.

The food Emmanuel Strooband created all turned out looking very pretty.

This is the Tuna Tar-Tar Taco With GUINNESS®.

It's a starter dish quite easily prepared with Sashimi-grade tuna, gherkin, shallot, caper, mayonnaise, tomato sauce, Worcestershire sauce, tabasco sauce and GUINNESS® all mixed together and served on a taco.

This is the main course, Kakuni Style Braised Chicken with GUINNESS®, Fresh Herb Risotto and GUINNESS® Poached Oyster.

The dessert dish Emmanuel prepared is called "The Giodness".

It's GUINNESS® jelly, brownies and crumble nicely layered inside a shot glass, then topped with coffee ice-cream and finished with foam. Very yummy!

After the cooking demonstration by Emmanuel, the organizers had a little something up their sleeves for those in attendance. There was a live hands-on cooking session where attendees were chosen to go on stage and duplicate those dishes that the celebrity chef had demonstrated earlier.

Having not slept well the night before, I was secretly praying that they not to pick me because, y'know, I don't wanna be known as the guy responsible for burning Mandarin Oriental down.

Luckily, KY was picked.

Cheesie was also picked.

But in the end, I also kena picked.

ARGHHH!!!

My team mates were the chef from The Apartment and a journalist from The Sun, and we're tasked to prepare the main course.

It was the most difficult dish from the demonstration earlier.

Please lah I don't even know how to cut an onion how am I supposed to cook such a complicated main course!

This was me frantically studying my notes while the master chef from The Apartment showed me HOW TO CUT AN ONION.

Look mom, I'm cutting an onion!

And I'm stirring the pot!

While I cooked the fresh herb risotto, my two other team mates diligently prepared the braised chicken thigh.

They've put together a mixture of water, black pepper, sugar, soy, garlic, ginger, aniseed pod and GUINNESS®. The chicken thigh was baked in it for 20 minutes, then pan-fried and served with a little bit of the mixture as sauce. (E-mail me if anyone is interested in more detailed recipe)

Meanwhile, my risotto was cooked "al dente" (phwoar, first time I use such a canggih word here) and I scooped it onto a round shaper for presentation.

Half an hour later, we presented our masterpiece!

Not bad aye?

Obviously it was nothing compared to the one Emmanuel made earlier, but it was surprisingly very tasty and looked like something I'd pay good money for.

This is me and my team mates, and me flaring my nose as if to take all the credit.

That was my first time cooking a meal fit for fine-dining.

I was overcome with a sense of personal satisfaction as I served my creation to my friends sitting in the front row, and watched as their face changed (and not foam at the mouth or turn green).

It's a weird but wonderful feeling. This must be why so many people enjoy cooking as a hobby. If you're reading this mom, I hope you're happy I took that first step towards cooking. :)

Of course, all credits go to the master chef at The Apartment for guiding me through, and the "Chef In Black" Emmanuel Stroobant for the easy to follow recipe.